Division by Zero
by drakensis
Summary: Louise has vast power she doesn't know how to use. Now she summons someone from the Whately'verse which vast powers she doesn't know how to control.
1. Chapter 1

Blue sky, framing a girl's face. It took me a moment to realise she was looking down at me as I laid on the grass. "Who are you?"

I guessed she must be about my age, pale skin and strawberry-blonde hair, wearing a white blouse and grey pleated skirt under a black cloak. "That's what I was about to ask you." It half looked as if she was auditioning to play the role of a student in one of those stupid Harry Potter movies. (I'd rather enjoyed them until I wound up being enrolled in a boarding school located in a remote corner of Scotland. The jokes got old fast.) "Please tell me that that isn't the Minch Grammar uniform."

"What?" She glared down at me. "No! This is the renowned Tristain Academy of Magic."

Of course. Minch uniforms were dark blue, I remembered now that my head was clearing. But how had I come to be here? I had been at the train station in Carlisle waiting for the special train (yes, the school had its own limited train service, laugh it up). And then I'd woken, disorientated, here. Pushing myself up on my elbows I could see that there were a crowd of other kids, within a year or two of my age, examining the two of us. They all wore the same black cloaks and there was a huge castle in the middle distance beyond them, set on a grassy plain.

Well this wasn't Minch unless the prospectus had been lying about it being on an island. Was I being hazed somehow? It wouldn't be too hard for me to envisage some fat-headed psi thinking it would be funny to trap a new transfer in the delusion that she was attending some stupid Hogwarts knock-off.

My moment of contemplation gave the girl a moment to gather her wits, or potentially half of them at any rate. "I asked first, commoner!"

"Ellen Wright." I answered automatically, not fully processing the word 'commoner' for a moment as my eye caught sight of the wand in her hand. Everyone else was holding one as well, of course. Now all I needed was some slimy potions teacher to turn up and dock points to fit with the cliché.

A voice piped up from the crowd: "Louise, what were you thinking, calling a commoner with 'Summon Servant'?"

There was laughter from the other kids, strongly suggesting that the Louise who was the butt of the joke was the one looking at me. "I... I just made a little mistake!" she shouted back, her accent clear and refined. Of course, if one extrapolated from her brief words so far it was possible she considered herself part of a privileged class.

"Of course! After all, she's Louise the Zero!" another voice called back derisively and angry color flooded the pale skin of Louise's face.

I drew my legs up, rolling back on my shoulders a little which was enough warning even for the distracted Louise to back up slightly before I kipped to my feet. There were a couple of gasps from the crowd and even a little half-hearted applause as if I was putting on an act. The hood of my sweatshirt had slipped back a bit as I landed on my feet, causing a few more gasps and an incredulous "It's a girl," from at least one boy. I resent that. I'm not that flat-chested, even if I was only a little taller and curvier than Louise.

Speaking of her, she was shouting again, this time drawing the attention of someone who I presumed to be "Mr. Colbert!" Balding and middle-aged he would have looked a bit like my dad except that he was wearing a long black robe and carrying a big wooden staff, like the stereotype of a wizard from one of my brother's Dungeon and Dragon games.

"What is it that you want from me, Miss Vallière?"

Louise seemed be in something of a panic or even a frenzy, gesticulating wildly with her free hand and her wand (causing some pre-emptive ducking and dodging on the part of the crowd who certainly seemed to imagine that some harm could come from having the wand pointed at them. If this wasn't an illusion of some kind, perhaps they were right. "Please! Let me try the summoning one more time?"

This 'summoning', by implication, was supposedly the manner in which I had come here. I didn't care to assume that this was some strange dream, induced or otherwise, and could only hope that there was a complementary 'dismissal' to return me to the train station, preferably before I missed my train.

"I cannot allow that, Miss Vallière." Colbert seemed firm on this.

"Why not?" Louise's words echoed my own curiosity and I tentatively lowered my guard, so that I could use my telepathic gifts to see if I could pick up more meaning than their words would provide given my lack of subtext.

"It's strictly forbidden. When you are promoted to a second year student, you must summon a familiar, which is what you just did." The surface images of Colbert's thoughts were flickering and of no more use to me than his words saving that when he mentioned Louise's familiar I caught a glimpse of myself, as he saw me. Short chestnut hair and an annoyingly delicate looking face poking out of my baggy sweatshirt collar. Telepathy might sound cool but like most things, it requires control before it can become useful.

"Your elemental specialty is decided by the familiar that you summon. It enables you to advance to the appropriate courses for that element. You cannot change the familiar once you have summoned it, because the Springtime Familiar Summoning is a sacred rite. Whether you like it or not, you have no choice but to take her."

"But..." Louise protested, "I've never heard of having a commoner as a familiar!"

There was more laughter at that and Louise scowled ferociously at the guilty parties, without any noticeable effect upon them. I cleared my throat to draw some attention back to me. "If you will excuse me for saying so, you are very swift to identify me as a... commoner, was it? Perhaps your measure of the word is different than mine?"

A redheaded girl, who seemed to be on the verge of bursting dramatically out of her uniform (I loathed her immediately), stepped forwards from the crowd. "It's very simple, little familiar of Zero. Those who wield magic, like ourselves, are nobles and those who cannot are commoners." She laughed derisively. "How amusing if would be if you could use magic when your mistress cannot."

I was tempted to claim exactly that, but making the claim without being able to back it up would be embarrassing and I was not entirely sure that I could do anything that they would recognise as magic, for all that I had been classed as potentially having enough talent by Minch Grammar's reckoning to be signed up for elementary classes on the subject. It wasn't as if I'd had the chance to attend even one of the classes yet.

"Then I suppose that you would reckon me a commoner then," I conceded ruefully and looked over to see Louise stalking over to me in a state of high dudgeon, clearly having not swayed Colbert's mind as to making a second attempt.

"Hey you."

"Dare I hope you're about to send me home?"

She sniffed. "Just count yourself lucky. Normally you'd go your whole life without a noble doing this to you."

"I'm not so sure about that," came a whisper from a blond lad who was wearing his shirt half undone, presumably thinking that his scrawny chest made him look attractive to women. His voice was low enough that I don't think Louise heard him, but judging by the sudden stomp on his foot by the snooty-looking blonde standing beside him, she had. Not that the words meant much to me, but I quelled the temptation to take a quick rummage through his uppermost thoughts to try and work out what he was talking about. Instead I drew up my shields again and employed them in the manner that had first brought me to the attention of Minch Grammar, forming a psikinetic barrier around myself against whatever Louise was about to do to me. Perhaps if whatever she had in mind failed them sending me home so that she could make a second attempt would be more acceptable.

She waved her wand dramatically. "My name is Louise Françoise Le Blanc de La Vallière. Pentagon of the Five Elemental Powers; bless this humble being, and make her my familiar." And then she tapped me - more precisely, my shield - over my forehead.

"Go for it, Zero," called the redhead cattily.

"What are you doing?"

"Just hold still." Louise grasped my chin, closed her eyes and leant in.

I backed away of course, shaking off her hand easily enough. "Look I'm not one to judge, but I don't lean that way."

"Just be still so I can get this over with!"

I sighed and reinforced my shield over my face. If she was just kissing that then it didn't count, right? As a proper kiss I mean. "Fine, get it over with."

This time I let her press her lips over mine, able to feel them even through the shield, which was itself only micrometers thick. Her face was flushed when she pulled away, hopefully with embarrassment like my own cheeks. If she was getting excited about kissing another girl - me, no less - then I swore I would enact a terrible revenge against her, somehow. Or against whoever was messing with my head, if that was the case, although I didn't think that a delusion would have withstood my telepathy readily: I admit to being clumsy in that regard, but I don't lack mental force if the testers were to be believed.

Colbert seemed happy at least. "Well done, Miss Vallière. You may have failed 'Summon Servant' many times, but you succeeded on your first attempt at 'Contract Servant'."

Even this didn't quell the jokers amongst the crowd and I could hear sly comments that the spell only worked because I wasn't a powerful creature. Hah. I very much imagine they would have been laughing on the other side of their faces had they known exactly what I was capable of. Then again, not even I was entirely sure of that.

"Don't make fun of me!" Louise shouted at the nearest taunter, face set in a scowl. "Even I do things right once in a while!"

"Truly 'once in a while', Louise the Zero," laughed the blonde who was still standing next to the would-be playboy despite his earlier gaffe.

"Mr. Colbert! Montmorency the Flood just insulted me!"

Now it was the blonde's turn to colour. "Who are you calling 'the Flood'? I'm Montmorency the Fragrance!"

"I heard you used to wet the bed like a flood, didn't you? 'The Flood' suits you better!" I had to admit that that was an excellent zinger on the part of Louise.

"I hadn't expected better manners from Louise the Zero!"

"That's enough." Colbert was apparently done naively waiting for the two girls to settle their spat peacefully. "Nobles ought to show each other the proper respect."

I was a little distracted from this by the sudden burning heat that was rushing through my body. It occurred to me, rather too late, that I should have checked that magic cared whether she was kissing my psikinesis or my flesh. Evidently it did not. I like to think of myself as a hardened martial artist, able to take a hit even without my shield - even before my abilities activated this last spring.

This was something else. The heat was most intense, not in my face where Louise had made contact with me, but on the back of my left hand. I doubled over, sweat springing from my brow as my free hand clutched at what my nerves claimed must be some serious injury. "What did you do to me!"

"Don't make a fuss. The Familiar's Runes are being inscribed, it will be over soon."

My response to Louise's admonition would have had Mum rushing to wash my mouth out with soap and water.

"Don't use that kind of language in front of nobles." Louise seemed shocked by my vocabulary. Presumably she had no brothers base enough to curse in front of her.

The relief when the pain ebbed was such that I slumped to the grass once more, still covering the back of my hand when Colbert tried to examine it. I will admit that snatching his staff out of his hand and flicking it between his legs to knock him to the floor was over-reacting - I could easily have broken his fingers or his legs in the process.

"Miss Vallière, restrain your familiar!" he barked, scrambling back to his feet and trying to tug the staff away from me. The attempt was laughable - with my fingers closed around it, so too was my shield and he would have had more luck dragging me off my feet than of breaking my grip, but I let go at a suitable moment and let him overbalance backwards to the tittering of his class while Louise waved her wand at me in what I suspected was impotent threat.

"Right, well." Colbert coughed. "Back to class everyone." With apparent ease he levitated from the ground to a standing position and then continued to rise upwards, turning his back upon me. With the exception of Louise, the teenagers followed his example. Could everyone here fly like superman? Well that was one thing I couldn't match... although if magic could let me fill that gap in my abilities then I'd definitely be having a quiet look to see if I could figure it out.

"Louise, you'd better walk back!" jeered Montmorency as she rose past the strawberry blonde girl.

The redhead from earlier added: "She shouldn't try to fly. She can't even manage levitation."

Rather than exploding at them, Louise apparently decided I would make a better target for her wrath. "Who are you!"

I drew myself up to my full height, perhaps two inches more than her own unimposing stature. "I am Ellen Wright, a British Citizen and soon to enter the Sixth Form of Minch Grammar School."

"Grammar school? You had to attend a school just to teach you how to speak properly?" Louise waved her hand (and wand) dismissively. "Never mind that. I am Louise de La Vallière, second year student at Tristain Academy of Magic. I am your master from now on. Remember that!"

"For your information, where I come from Grammar Schools are the oldest and most prestigious of schools, with the privilege of selecting only the finest students." I didn't think it was relevant to tell her that despite its name, Minch Grammar School had only existed for about five years. My previous school could trace its history over three hundred years. "I don't have any master. Well the queen maybe."

She humphed. "How could I, the third daughter of the Vallière family... a noble who takes pride in her proper pedigree and ancient lineage... end up having to make someone like you my familiar?"

"Can't you send me back?"

"I don't know what backwoods you came from, how can I possibly send you back?"

"You managed to bring me here, didn't you?"

She shrugged. "That's completely different."

Her voice held the certainty of someone who had no idea what they were talking about and was taking an absolutist stance in order to bring the discussion to an end. Either way, it was clear that she was a dead end as far as sending me home went. "So what now?"

Louise pointed at the school. "We walk back to class."

.oOo.

There hadn't actually been any more class and Louise took me up to her room. Apparently the claim to nobility on the part of the students was upheld by the furnishings. The dresser and table were functional enough, although they looked as if they belonged in an antiques store. I personally felt that the four poster bed was a bit much.

Louise had huffed when I took a chair. Apparently a 'commoner' wasn't supposed to be sitting on equal terms to one of the nobility. She chose to take up residence on the bed while we talked, apparently feeling that this gave her back some sort of moral superiority. "Is that true?" she asked after I had recounted what I remembered from before I found myself on the grass outside the Academy.

"No, I was lying to you in order further my nefarious scheme."

Louise snarled slightly at my sarcasm. "Don't talk to me like that! I'm your master, remember!"

"How can I forget when every other thing you say is a reminder?" I leant back on the chair putting my weight on first two legs and then just one. Keeping my balance like that was an interesting exercise. That Louise hadn't even heard of trains made it fairly unlikely I was just at some other school for 'gifted' children. I couldn't think of many places in the world that didn't have trains and none of them would be like this. So either I was in some sectioned off little corner of the globe that hadn't had any contact with anyone for hundreds of years (possible, if far-fetched) or I wasn't on Earth at all. Or a ridiculously powerful mage or psi had me trapped inside an illusion but if that was the case then there wasn't anything much I could do about it.

"I guess this must be some other world," I muttered, trying to think of any information about the notion. So far as was aware it wasn't something that had happened for real although for all I knew it might be an everyday experience at Minch. The only examples I could think of were fictional: Edgar Rice Burroughs' John Carter books that I'd borrowed from my brother and the Gor books that mum had raised a fuss about after he brought one back from the library (I didn't really feel I'd missed much in not reading those).

"Some other world?" Louise parroted. "Do you have any proof you're not just from the countryside somewhere?"

I went through my pockets looking for anything to prove it. My purse didn't have anything to convince Louise - funny money could have meant anything - although she was impressed that the 'portrait' of me on my library card was so realistic (I don't know why I'd brought that, I wouldn't be able to go to the library until I was home from Minch). My watch was mechanical and but apparently that was close enough to their means of telling time here that it didn't arouse suspicion. Eventually I found my I-Pod and convinced Louise to try it. She didn't like the music but agreed grudgingly that she'd never come across anything like it before.

"What element of magic does it use? Wind?" she asked.

"I don't think it uses magic at all. It's electricity."

Louise looked at me blankly. "So what kind of element is electricity? Is it different from the four elemental powers?"

"It's like controlled lightning," I explained. "But like I just said, it's not controlled by magic."

"Controlled... lightning..." Louise said somewhat reverently. I wondered what was going though her head, which naturally caused my telepathy to kick in. The image prevalent in her mind was of charred figures (somewhat resembling what I'd seen of her classmates) cowering away from a ten feet tall Louise who was laughing in a disturbing fashion. "Can you teach me to use that?"

"Nope."

"Hmph."

"I don't know exactly how it works." I admitted. Secondary school physics was high on the theory and rather low on the practicality of creating modern micro-electronics. It wasn't as if I was a gadgeteer or something - otherwise I could kick off an industrial revolution here.

Not that one seemed to be particularly necessary, since Louise responded to the descending sun by snapping her fingers, causing a lamp on the table to flicker to life.

"Neat. Was that magic?"

"Of course," she said matter of factly and then coloured. "I didn't do it myself, the lamp is spelled to respond to commands."

"Really?" I snapped my fingers and the lamplight died.

"Hey!" Louise lit it again. "Stupid commoner. Stop playing with the lamp."

I grinned and held my fingers ready snap them again.

"Don't you dare!" Louise looked around, snatched up her pillow and lobbed it at me. I caught it easily, of course, but doing so without losing my balance meant that my hands were full and I couldn't snap my fingers so I suppose her tactic worked.

"So what are familiars supposed to do?" If I was stuck being her familiar (until I found a way to go home) then I should probably try to do a good job of it. After all, I was pretty much dependent upon her right now as it was clear that no one else at the school cared in the least that I'd been snatched away to be her property. Not that I'd admit that sort of weakness to Louise of course.

She drew her self up self-importantly. "Firstly, a familiar is able to grant its master an enhancement in vision and hearing."

I blinked. "What? Like, infrared vision or something?"

"'What-read vision'?" Louise shook her head. "It means that what a familiar sees, the master can also see. But it seems that doesn't work with you. I can't see anything."

"Don't be so sure of that." I focused on the image of looking at her sat on the bed and tried to gently push that in amongst her thoughts. Altering another's thoughts is the hardest and most restricted sorts of telepathy from what I'd heard and I certainly wasn't able to do so without it being noticed. Which would be illegal. And wrong. And I certainly had not tried. Much.

"Ahahaha!" Louise laughed triumphantly. "Of course it would work now that you try!"

I smirked slightly and then altered the image to show huge floppy rabbit ears poking up out of her hair. Louise's laugh turned into a squawk and she clutched at her head, checking to make sure that such ears didn't really exist. "Don't do that to your master!"

"Right, right, whatever."

She glared at me. "You should speak more formally if you attended a special school for that. It should be: 'I'm sorry master, I will not make that mistake again'."

"Consider yourself forgiven." I waved my hand dismissively as she fumed. "So is that all familiars do, spy for their masters?"

"Not at all. A familiar will also retrieve items that its master desires. For example, reagents."

"That sounds chemical... for potions, right."

"So you do know something useful." Louise sounded surprised.

"I don't know what sorts of things you'll want but I might be able to find them," I agreed. "If you've got a book or something so I know what to look for."

"Alright so that works. And the most important thing of all... A familiar exists to protect its master! The task of protecting them from any and all enemies is a duty of the highest priority! But that might be a little bit problematic for you. A powerful magical beast would almost always defeat its enemies but I don't think you could even beat a raven."

"I knocked that teacher of yours around quite easily."

Louise didn't seem to think that that was very impressive. "He just took pity on you and didn't use any magic. No mage would ever really be defeated by anything that wasn't magical."

I wasn't quite so sure that magic was so decisive but decided it would be best not to argue. "So basically I run errands for you."

"Finally you understand. I'll only make you do things I'm sure you can manage: laundry, cleaning and other tasks."

"And what do I get out of this?"

"You should be grateful for the privilege."

I gave Louise a searching look but as far as I could tell, she wasn't even being sarcastic. "What did your last slave die of?"

"S-shut up!"

"Seriously, the very least you owe me is to feed and house me." I adopted an authoritarian pose: "Having a familiar is a big responsibility, you know." I don't think she realised then just how much mutants like myself need to eat. Our powers don't just happen, we go through huge amounts of energy and have to replenish it somehow.

"Well of course I will." Louise yawned. "Right then, all this talking has made me sleepy."

I nodded. "Where do I sleep?"

Louise pointed to the floor.

"The hell you say!"

"But there's nowhere else. And there's only one bed." She stripped the top blanket off the bed and offered me it at least.

"It's a good sized bed and neither of us is all that large."

"Do you think for one minute that the third daughter of the Vallière family would share her bed with her familiar!"

"We're both girls so it wouldn't matter." I took the blanket and the pillow Louise had thrown at me earlier and stood up, advancing on the bed. Then I paused. "Unless you kissing me earlier was significant somehow?"

Louise's cheeks went pink. "It was the spell! It was the spell!" she insisted.

"Then there's not a problem, is there?" I asked as I arranged the pillow at the bottom of the bed.

My 'master' proceeded to express her belief that there was indeed a problem by taking the other pillow and smacking me with it. As I had my shield up, it didn't make any impression on me but on the second swat I snagged it out of her hands, tossed it onto the floor and proceeded to yank her forwards trapping her under one arm as I delivered two swift smacks with my other hand, one to each butt cheek. Her shocked cry suggested that corporal punishment was not something she was accustomed to.

"Are you done acting like a child?" I asked, letting her struggle fruitlessly against my grip. Her arms were pinned against her sides and even if they had been free, she had as much chance of breaking loose from my vastly greater strength as newborn baby had of wrestling an elephant to the ground.

Once I was sure that she had comprehended her helplessness I released her and let her scoot up the bed until she was pressed against the headboard, eyes wide in sudden fear.

"There was once a teacher, long before I was born," I exaggerated slightly, "Who expressed the great wisdom that life is like a sewer: what you get out of it tends to resemble what you put into it."

She didn't understand, I could tell. Not that I can entirely blame her. It was probably the first time in her life she had ever been faced with a threat beyond harsh and mocking words.

"If you treat me like a dog, Louise, then I will give you no more help or support than you could expect from a dog. A big, hungry dog that destroys everything around it because it doesn't know any better. A dog that bites," I snapped my teeth illustratively "the hand that feeds it."

There was a muffled eep escaped from the other end of the bed where Louise had practically crammed her knuckles into her mouth.

Then I smiled. "But if you treat me as a friend and companion then I will treat you in the same way. Wouldn't that be much more pleasant for both of us?"

I'm not quite sure that she was any more reassured by my smiling than she had been by my vague (and almost entirely empty) threat. Without her being willing to provide food and shelter I would have to obtain them myself and I had only the slightest notion of how I might do so in this strange land. Besides which, while I'm certainly very good at fighting in a dojo I have the unsettling notion that simply leaving might lead to small legions of magic users trying to arrest me. I've no idea how such a scenario would play out and I wasn't at all sure I'd like the answer.

Perhaps it would be best to confide in her a little. "You didn't just summon anybody, you know."

"You see, just as Tristain Academy exists to teach young magi how to use magic, there are schools in my homeland that exist to teach young people with rare and special talents how to use them. These people are called mutants and Minch Grammar is a school set up to teach us how to use these powerful talents without destroying ourselves and those around us."

That didn't seem to reassure her very much.

"In my case, because I haven't been to the school yet I only have a little idea of what I can do and how to do them, but I assure you that certain of my talents are extremely useful."

"W-what can you do?"

I smiled. Louise's curiosity, as I had hoped, was overwhelming her fears. "In world's parlance I am believed to be what is called a Package-Deal Psychic: that is to say, I have a little bit of telepathy, a little bit of clairvoyance and a little bit of psikinesis. And when I say a little bit, I mean that I can only do a few things with them but that what I can do I do with great power. So when it comes to the matter of powerful magical beasts..." I gestured dismissively. "Well, I think I can do more than a mere raven."

"I've not ever heard of any of those," Louise said, unimpressed.

I sighed. "Let's start with telepathy..."


	2. Chapter 2

I woke in bed, since I'd won my argument with Louise over the sleeping arrangements. I don't think she'd been in with much of a chance from the outset since, after all, she simply didn't have the physical strength to move me against my will, apparently wasn't skilled enough to accomplish it by arcane means and couldn't bear to face the humiliation of having to have someone else discipline her familiar.

Of course what woke me was Louise kicking me in the face.

There was nothing especially malicious about it. I was lying in the opposite direction to Louise so her feet were fairly near my head to begin with and then she'd rolled over. Still, it got my attention since amongst the little weaknesses of my mutant powers that I hadn't explicitly stated to Louise the night before was that psi powers such as my shield only work when I'm conscious. They don't take much concentration but I'm certainly not providing that when I'm asleep.

Granted, I wasn't hurt by the flailing foot but it was noticeable and once my eyes were open and I could see that sunlight was entering the room I wasn't particularly inclined to resume sleep. With a sigh I scrambled out of bed and found my clothes where I had left them, piled on one of the chairs. There wasn't much I could do about the T-shirt I'd slept in except turn it inside out and hope I could borrow something to wear once I worked out how laundry worked around here.

I didn't bother putting my socks or trainers on though. Instead I crept barefoot to the window, unlatched it and gently pushed it open, shivering slightly at the cold morning air. This entire business of being summoned was a colossal inconvenience (to put it mildly) but I would at least take the opportunities that were the other side of the coin. Mum would have had a fit to see me practicing martial arts anywhere but a nice, flat, supervised location, perhaps because she had an excellent appreciation of the risks in anything else. She would have objected strenuously to my taking my practice onto a roof even if I had been able to fly. And as I've mentioned, I can't. Not yet anyway.

Slates wet with morning dew proved something of a challenging footing, particularly since they were of course at something of a sharp angle and I spent several minutes skidding perilously close to the edge as I got a feel for the surface with my bare feet. Eventually I got the hang of it - or the dew dried - and I was able to work through some of the forms, stretching out after the night's sleep.

The sound of half-asleep mumbling from below drew my attention to the fact that Louise, my 'master', was awakening. With one last kiai I hopped off the roof, twisting in mid-air to catch hold of the edge. Kicking my legs to build momentum, I swung, let go and landed in a neat perch on the windowsill.

Louise squawked in alarm at my sudden appearance. "Wh-what? Who..."

I jumped down into the room. "Ellen, remember? Your familiar?"

"Oh. That's right, I summoned you yesterday, didn't I?"

Evidently she wasn't a morning person. "Indeed." I bowed slightly. "So how may I serve you?"

She yawned as she scrambled out from under her blankets. "Clothes."

Once I'd passed her the uniform she'd worn before, she directed me to get her fresh underwear from one of the drawers. I made a note of that since my own was... not fresh. I wasn't so large that I probably couldn't borrow Louise's. Preferably without her finding out, which would be relatively easy since she apparently intended to delegate all responsibility for them to me.

"Clothes," she mumbled again.

"Yes, Louise, clothes." I confirmed.

"Dress me."

Ugh. What was she, three? "You're kidding."

"You must not know because you're a commoner, but nobles will not dress themselves if a servant is available."

"We have a word for people who can't put on their own clothes," I told her, picking up her blouse and opening up a sleeve to maneuver it over her arm. "It's not 'noble' though."

.oOo.

Louise's room was one of four on this landing and another student was leaving her room as we departed. It was the big-breasted redhead from yesterday and she grinned broadly when she saw us. "Good morning, Louise."

"Good morning... Kirche," replied my master grudgingly. I rather got the impression that she was no fonder of the other girl than my own first impression had made me.

"And here's your familiar," Kirche declared as if that was a great discovery on her part. "Are you really just a human?"

That was something of a matter of opinion back home and I didn't feel like going into a long winded explanation. "I am as you see me."

"Ahaha! That's amazing. It's just like you to summon a commoner with 'Summon Servant'. What else to expect from Louise the Zero?"

"Shut up." Louise was blushing again.

"I summoned a familiar yesterday too." Kirche seemed to enjoy the evident impact her boasting was having on Louise's emotional equilibrium. "Unlike a certain somebody, I was successful on my first try."

"Really."

Kirche smirked triumphantly. "And, if you're going to have a familiar, it should be a good one, like this. Flame!" In response to her command a crocodile-like creature slithered from her room. Unlike any lizard I had ever seen in a zoo, it's scales were a dark red and the creature seemed to actually be radiating heat. The tip of its tail was actually on fire and sparks and embers were visible when it opened its mouth. Try as I might, I couldn't avoid displaying my surprise, though the creature showed no sign of hostility.

"Ohoho! Don't tell me this is your first time seeing a fire lizard."

My eyes narrowed and I reached out. "As a matter of fact it is. A salamander from the Fire Dragon Mountains, is it not?" I had no idea where the Fire Dragon Mountains were or what a salamander was, but that was uppermost in Kirche's thoughts as she stared pridefully at her familiar. I didn't want to press further or she might have realised her thoughts were being perused.

"That's right! See, look at the tail," she exclaimed. "It's like a brand. Collectors can't even put a price on these!"

Louise looked as if she was sucking on a lemon. "That's nice."

"And it perfectly matches my affinity for fire!" She did a little twirl. "For am I not Kirche the Ardent, the ardent of gently smoldering passion. Everywhere I go, I have boys falling for me. Unlike you." She thrust her chest out dramatically.

"Then I'm surprised that you didn't wind up summoning a cow. With really huge udders."

That was a pretty nice zinger, I noted. Then noticed that Louise was looking at me with surprise and perhaps a hint of approval and Kirche was also looking at me with surprise and perhaps a hint of anger. Ah. So I was the one who'd said that. Imprudent of me.

Miss 'The Ardent' shrugged the insult off however. "Those with great natural talents must always face the jealousy of those less blessed," she declared, stroking her flaming red hair and then dashed off, the salamander scuttling after her.

Louise shook her fist in the direction of Kirche's departing back. "Ooh! That girl gets on my nerves! Just because she summoned a... hey, how did you know her salamander was from the Fire Dragon Mountains? If you're really from another world you couldn't have ever heard of them."

I smiled slightly. "Telepath, remember? I just plucked the information out of her head."

Her eyes went wide, last night's explanation now raising rash ideas of impractical uses for that little talent now rushing through her mind. No, I wasn't reading it, she was just that obvious. "Does she have any embarrassing stories about bedwetting or something?" she asked eagerly.

"No idea. I didn't relive her entire life, I just skimmed the top of her thoughts. People tend to notice if I do more than that."

"Hmph. Well tell me the minute you learn anything like that." Louise started stalking the stairs and then paused. "Have you ever had a look inside my mind?"

"Not inside," I assured her. "Although when you're thinking very... well, loudly, it's difficult not to pick it up."

Her immediate reflex was of course relief that I wasn't aware of certain childhood embarrassments that were therefore vividly displayed to me as a result. I forced my psikinetic shields up, partly because focusing on that neutralized my telepathy and partly by reflex in case Louise guessed that I had just picked up some rather embarrassing blackmail material on her and tried to throw me down the stairs.

"It's a pity no one will believe you're magical," she said bitterly, having concluded last night that my psi must be magic of some kind. "You can determine a mage's true power just by looking at his or her familiar but you don't look half as impressive as that idiot's salamander."

"Excuse me for being grateful for that." I shuddered. "Some mutants don't look at all human and that's rarely a good sign. It's called Gross Structural Dystrophy and if you're lucky it might just mean that everyone who looks at you knows that you aren't a baseline. If you're not lucky, expect to spend the rest of your life trapped in a hospital bed. And the rest of your life might not be all that long."

"What do you mean?"

"There's supposed to be a kid who just turned to liquid years and years ago. If they hadn't gotten him into a tub he'd have just drained away. As it is, he's still living in a vat." The tale was a standard horror story used in explaining what could go wrong with mutation and I decided that Louise didn't need to know that the mutant in question was a powerful psychic and wasn't exactly trapped in his body.

As it was she turned pale. "Could that happen to you?"

"It's not likely, or it would probably have started by now, but he'd been a mutant for years before it began, so maybe."

.oOo.

The dining hall for Tristain Academy of Magic was rather a grand hall, located in the centre of the campus and towering over the surroundings with a tall, cathedral-like ceiling. Long tables that could probably seat a hundred students each were occupied by just about that many. Each table's students wore different coloured cloaks - black like Louise being the option for the middle out of the three. A fourth table across the top was evidently for teachers.

The decorations were lavish with candles, flower arrangements and fruit bowls all along the tables and statues lining each side of the chamber. Personally I thought that with the ample light streaming through the windows, the candles were an unnecessary fire hazard but perhaps there was some kind of magical effect that took care of that.

"Impressive," I conceded.

"Tristain's Academy of Magic doesn't teach just magic, you know," Louise lectured me. "Almost all mages are nobles. The saying 'nobles achieve nobility through the use of magic' is a foundation for the education we receive as nobles. Thus, our dining halls must also be fitting a noble's status."

I had a few ideas about what else would be fitting a noble's status, but held my tongue. It was a trifle early to be fomenting revolution in the dining hall.

"Normally a commoner like you would never set foot inside the Alviss Dining Hall. Be grateful."

"I think you're forgetting a lot of our discussion last night," I murmured as Louise paused at an unoccupied seat, keeping my voice low enough that the students around us might not overhear unless they were paying attention to 'Louise the Zero' and her unusual, if impressive familiar. I was going to have to get the story behind Louise's nickname at some point, although the substance was easy enough to guess.

"You're supposed to pull out my chair," she hissed back.

"Milady." I drew the tall chair back easily enough for her to sit on it, and then pushed it close to the table. "Let me guess," I added sotto voce, leaning over the back of the chair. "No seats for commoners."

Louise's head nodded. Then her hand moved to point at a small bowl on the floor next to her seat. A small bowl with... I'm not sure what it was. Some sort of thin soup - gruel perhaps, with some fragments of meet and half a loaf of some bread that looked like it might be on the verge of creating penicillin. Given my usual appetite that wouldn't keep me going for long.

I looked at the dishes on the table. The word lavish could be applied to their contents. Perhaps even sumptuous. "If you think I'm settling for that crud then you're going to be wearing it," I hissed.

"You know, familiars are supposed to stay outside. You're only in here because I especially requested it."

I considered this. Make a stand or play along for now? My stomach made the choice for me. "Given that you're supposed to be my master, just how much trouble would you be in if I smashed this hall to kindling?"

Louise stiffened. "Don't you dare!"

"I don't give a crap about the bowl, but the food just isn't enough."

Eyes were beginning to be directed towards us and Louise squirmed. "Trust me," she mumbled.

A few moments later I was eyeing the food in my bowl with no particular enthusiasm as Louise, along with the other students, chanted a well-rehearsed grace thanking some great founder (of the academy I suppose) and their Queen for their 'humble meal'. A moment later there was a rattle of cutlery as the students began to eat and a sizeable leg of chicken dropped off the table almost into my bowl. I caught it before it could splash into the thin stew and looked up, seeing Louise glancing apparently casually in my direction.

It was a start. Not enough, but I'd give Louise points for at least trying.

A few minutes later I was mopping up the stew with the bread when a couple of apples 'slipped' off the table in my direction. I munched them down one after the other and was still hungry. Maybe I could slip away and find the kitchens.

.oOo.

"This isn't going to work," I told Louise as we walked from the dining hall towards the classroom.

"What isn't going to work?"

"I appreciate you slipping me a little extra food, but it still won't be enough," I told her.

Louise stamped her foot harder than was necessary on the stone floor. "Don't be greedy! You're just a familiar you know."

I sighed. "I'm not being greedy, Master. I simply need to eat more than a human would. I can do some remarkable things but it all has to be fuelled by something. If I don't eat roughly twice what you got served for breakfast, three times a day, then I will start to starve."

Her eyes went wide. "That's ridiculous. You'd as fat as a pig within a week if you ate that much."

"Trust me on this, Louise. I can manage short rations briefly, but if I don't get a real meal today then I'll carve up your friend's salamander and eat it. At least it'll come pre-cooked."

"Don't!" she half-shrieked. "Attacking another mage's familiar... I'd be expelled!"

I shrugged my shoulders and shadow-boxed for a moment as light from a window we passed cast our shadows against a white-painted wall. "Well we wouldn't want that. Look - point me at the kitchens and I'll see what I can scrounge there to keep me going."

"Save it until after class," Louise insisted.

The classroom she led me into was laid out like a lecture hall, with ranks of seats rising like stairs along one side and the teacher's position opposite them at ground level. On our entrance we became the immediate focus of every student in the room. The laughter started almost immediately and while I wasn't entirely sure of where it had begun, I wouldn't have been surprised if it was where Kirche was sat, surrounded by a group of boys. I suppose the big booby had them wrapped around her chest. Not too surprising.

In addition to students, the room was host to just as many familiars: my peers, so to speak. Owls, ravens, cats and even a sizeable snake were in evidence but there was no doubt that the kings and queens of this display were the evident magical creatures such as Kirche's salamander, another lizard, this one with six legs; a huge floating eyeball that I guessed would be a beholder (Louise later told me it was actually a bugbear, which made no sense to me, although not much did right now).

Louise took a seat at the back of the room. None of the students took a seat at that block of three desks so I took the chair next to her. She gave me a sidelong look. "That's a mage's chair." Then she shook her head. "Don't blame me if the teacher tells you to get out of it." I suppose that that passed for some degree of acceptance.

A moment later the door opened and a middle-aged woman in a purple robe walked in. I had to stifle a chuckle at the pointed hat she was wearing. She was so stereotypically a witch that I half expected her to be carrying a black cat in a cauldron hanging off a broomstick. Her face was round and plump with a kindly expression, which made her just about the friendliest person I'd seen since my arrival yesterday.

She looked around the classroom and nodded in apparent satisfaction. "Well, everyone, it seems that the Springtime Familiar Summoning was a great success. I, Chevreuse, always enjoy seeing the new familiars that are summoned each spring." Then her eye settled on me and she blinked. "My, my. You've summoned quite a... peculiar familiar, Miss Vallière."

There was another explosion of laughter from around the room and one wit decided to interject: "Louise the Zero! Don't go around grabbing random commoners off the street just because you can't summon anything!"

Louise snapped to her feet, hair billowing around her. "No! I did everything properly! She was all that appeared!"

"Don't lie! I bet you couldn't even cast 'Summon Servant' properly, right?" From the chuckling that seemed to have been a widespread perception.

I slowly rose to my feet, reminding myself that if Louise was willing to make at least some efforts to be what passed for friendly towards me then I should at least make some move to defend her. However, Louise's mouth moved faster than me. "Mrs. Chevreuse! I've been insulted! Malicorne the 'Common Cold' just insulted me!" She emphasised her words by banging on the desk with her fist.

"Common cold?" the boy protested. "I'm Malicorne the Windward! I haven't caught any cold."

"Well your hoarse voice sounds exactly like you've caught one!"

Malicorne took to his own feet at that but Chevreuse pointed her wand up at us all and made a sharp gesture. I could feel a sudden pressure dragging at me and saw the two nobles jerking like puppets before sitting down woodenly, faces dejected. Either Chevreuse wasn't using as much force on me or they were quite unused to using their muscles since even without surrounding myself with my shields I was able to resist the pressure. I saw the teacher's eyes widen slightly as I didn't yield to her magic and then I bowed slightly in her direction. The moment that Chevreuse lowered her wand the pressure vanished and I then returned to my seat, satisfied that I had made my point.

"Calling friends 'Zero' or 'Common Cold' is not acceptable. Do you understand?" And what had how you treated friends to do with how Malicorne and Louise interacted? Oh, this was probably the adult use of 'friend' meaning 'people we've stuck you in a room with'.

The boy apparently hadn't had enough. "Mrs. Chevreuse, I'm only called that as a joke, but for Louise, it's the truth."

Chevreuse put a stop to the giggles at that with another point of her want that stopped up the mouths involved with red clay. "You people shall continue the lesson in that state." She shook her head. "Now, let's begin the lesson."

I leant forwards a bit. Magic was apparently the key to status in this world and if I could get a handle on that then I would be in a better position. Not necessarily on easy street - there were undoubtedly twists and turns for a commoner who 'presumed above her station' and took to magic - but since I was pretty much at the bottom of the social heap already, just about anything would be an improvement.

The woman placed a few pebbles on the desk in front of her. "My runic name is 'Red Clay', Chevreuse the Red Clay." I'd have been less than impressed with that if I hadn't just seen her method of dealing with hecklers. "This year I will be teaching you all the magic of the Earth element. Do you know the four great elements of magic, Mr. Malicorne?"

I took a guess that this would be based off the old Greek concepts and was proved right when Malicorne's answer of Fire, Water, Earth and Wind was confirmed by Chevreuse.

"And combined with the now-lost element of 'Void', there are five elements in total - as everyone should already know. of the five elements, I believe Earth holds an extremely important position." She coughed. "This isn't just because my affinity is Earth, nor is it simply a personal preference. The magic of Earth is very important magic that governs the creation of all matter. If it wasn't for Earth magic, we wouldn't be able to produce or process necessary metals. Raising buildings from large boulders and harvesting crops would also involve much more work. In this manner, the magic of the Earth element is intimately related to everyone's life."

I fought back a whistle. Accomplishing all those feats with science meant that anyone who put some effort into it could learn to do so - maybe not with great expertise, but passably. However, if it was dependent on magic here - as apparently it was - then it was no wonder that those with magic had come to dominant positions in the social hierarchy. And that would mean teaching the relatively small number of magic users in each generation how to use their talents would be critical to maintaining their civilisation. No wonder the Academy was considered be highly important.

"Now, everyone, please recall that the basic magic of the Earth element is 'transmutation'. While there will be people here who have already learned this in their first year, basics build foundations, so let's review it once more." Chevreuse twirled her wand over the pebbles, whispering a spell that I couldn't hear. I hope that the successful use of magic isn't dependent on exact pronunciation of spells. The pebbles glowed brightly for a moment and when the light died down they were shining metal.

Kirche leant forwards, breast stretching the fabric of her blouse. "Is that g-gold, Mrs. Chevreuse!"

"No," Chevreuse corrected her. "It isn't. It's plain brass. Only square-class mages are able to transmute to gold. I'm just..." She coughed self-importantly. "A triangle mage."

"Why would that make a difference?" I mumbled to myself, thinking back to my own chemistry classes, grateful for my eidetic memory. Louise gave me an irritated look at asking that question out loud but declined to say anything.

I ignored the look, deep in my thought. Gold is a different element from those pebbles, but they were probably silicates of some kind (I'm not a geologist). Changing them to brass - basically copper and tin - wouldn't be all that different. Possibly it was a difference of degree not of kind - gold has a much higher atomic number than the metals in brass. From context a square mage would be considered better than a triangle mage, although I wasn't sure yet what the distinction was. Presumably a triangle mage was quite high up the scale since Chevreuse seemed quite proud of being rated as such.

Obviously I'd have to seek out whatever the Academy had in the way of a library once I had the opportunity. My stomach rumbled and I blushed at the reminder that I did have other priorities to address as well. Being a little distracted, I only caught the end of Chevreuse inviting Louise down to demonstrate her mastery of the same spell. Louise did not respond at first, simply giving the teacher a surprised look. "Eh? Me?"

"Yes. Try changing these pebbles here into a metal of your choice."

Louise still did not move and I gave her a worried look. "Are you alright?"

"Umm..." Kirche called, sounding more serious than she had thus far in my limited experience of the other girl. "I think it would be better if you didn't let her..."

Chevreuse frowned. "Why would that be, Miss Zerbst?"

"It's dangerous."

Dangerous? I looked around the class and saw that all the students seemed to be in agreement with Kirche. I'd gathered that Louise's proficiency with magic wasn't well thought of, but they seemed genuinely fearful of her even making the attempt.

The woman seemed equally surprised. "Dangerous? How so?"

"This is your first time teaching Louise, right?"

"It is," confirmed Chevreuse. "However, I have heard that she is a hard worker. Now, Miss Vallière, just give it a try. Don't worry about making mistakes, this is quite a simple spell."

Kirche turned towards Louise, apparently feeling that appealing to my master might yield the result she desired: "Don't Louise."

Her words apparently had the reverse of her intentions however as Louise stood up sharply. "I'll do it."

Chevreuse's smile was probably the only one in the room as Louise stepped down towards the front of the room. On a hunch I slid out of my own chair and followed her, spotting surreptitous movement by the other students who were apparently taking cover. Whatever they were expecting to happen involved destructive effects and while every instinct I had told me that I should avoid it, Louise was going to be in the middle of it and as long as she had whatever link to me was represented by the characters burned into the back of my hand, keeping her alive was a priority. As a precaution I raised my shields and did my best to reinforce them.

I wasn't surprised that no one paid attention to me following Louise. In their eyes I was little more than an animal.

"Miss Vallière, you have to visualise vividly the metal that you wish to transmute them into."

Louise pursed her lips and raised her wand over the pebbles. It would have looked cute, like a little kid playing at being Harry Potter, if it hadn't been for the premonition of danger I was feeling. Then she uttered a short incantation and flourished the wand forcefully.

The pebbles promptly exploded.

Closest to the blast, Louise and Chevreuse were hurled backwards. The teacher crashed into the blackboard and fell to the ground, only her twitching indicating that she hadn't been killed outright. Louise, on the other hand, was flung against me. Reflexively I caught her and braced, fortunate that my shield was sufficient to protect me. However, I and the area directly behind me were the only parts of the classroom spared.

To add to the pandemonium, dozens of familiars reacted instinctively to the unexpected noise and exploded into flight or hostility. One of the larger magical creatures simply smashed its way out through a window and from the calls of protest from one boy, his familiar had just become lunch for one of the others.

"That's why I told you not to let her do it!"

I turned and saw that it was Kirche who delivered that statement. However, it was Malicorne who added: "Jeez, Vallière! Save us some grief and just quit school already."

Louise pulled free from my arms. The explosion had left her black with soot and done quite a number on her clothes - skirt and blouse torn away to the point that they barely gave her any modesty at all. She didn't seem particularly fazed by the destruction she had wrought however. Or grateful for my small assistance either. In fact, from the sidelong look at she gave me, the fact that I wasn't as blackened and battered as her seemed to sting her pride.

"Looks like I messed up a little," she observed as she pulled a handkerchief out of one miraculously undamaged pocket and started to wipe at her face.

"That wasn't 'a little'!" Montmorency snapped from where she'd sheltered under a desk, "Louise the Zero!"

Kirche nodded knowingly. "Your success rate is always zero!"

Well that answered where the nickname came from. Actually, if this was typical I was somewhat surprised that Louise was still alive. Still, under the circumstances she was as close to an ally as I had so I held back on pointing that out. On the other hand, an explosion wasn't exactly a zero result, even if it wasn't intentional. There had certainly been a formidable amount of magic being thrown around but not so much in the way of control.

I suppose it could be said that Louise was a little like me in that.

"It seemed harmless enough to me." I patted Louise reassuringly on the shoulder.

"Clean."

I blinked and looked at the source of the voice. The girl standing near the door had been in the class earlier and now that I thought about it, I hadn't seen her after the explosion. Possibly she'd stepped outside for the duration of Louise's demonstration. Given the charred state of her classmates, that might have been a good idea.

"What was that, Tabitha?" Kirche's question didn't elicit more of a response from the girl but with that one word as a starting point it didn't take the redhead to zero in on the meaning. "Hey, how come you didn't get blown up like Mrs. Chevreuse?" she asked me pointedly.

"Why would I want to be?" I asked her, feigning innocent curiosity. "It seemed quite uncomfortable."

"It's not usually a choice, being around Louise the Zero!"

Okay. Denial had not succeeded in obscuring the facts of the matter. The next line of defense was to switch the blame.

I grabbed Louise by the shoulders and pulled her into a hug. "Lady Vallière shielded me with her body! I have such a caring master!"

.oOo.

It was the executive decision of the first member of the teaching staff to arrive on site that Louise's punishment was to clean up the room without the use of magic. Then again, I suspected the only form of cleaning that she was likely to be able to do with magic would involve atomising everything in the general vicinity.

Since class was pretty much abandoned (Mrs. Chevreuse was carted off to the infirmary and I later gathered that while she was awake within a couple of hours she wasn't up to teaching for the rest of the day) all the other students headed off in search of fresh entertainments which gave us a chance to talk relatively freely.

"It was that shield that you mentioned. That's why the explosion didn't affect you."

I nodded and lifted one of the desks, having decided that cleaning the room would go faster if they were all stacked neatly out of the way. Then I picked up another desk with my other hand and carried them over to a corner. "It made my ears ring a bit. If the shield blocked sound then I wouldn't be able to hear anything when it was up."

"..."

I turned my head and saw Louise staring open-mouthed at me. "What? Don't they cover basic sonics in classes here?"

"Aren't those heavy?"

Oh, the desks! "My shield... well I suppose it's more like a shell around my body, technically. I can use it to boost my strength. I suppose you could say that I'm as strong as I think I am." It was the work of a moment to place the desks down, one on top of the other.

Louise made a choking sound. "How strong do you think you are?"

"Pretty damn." I grinned. I admit to being a bit of a braggart at times. "I can chuck around a car... uh... a large wagon... pretty easily. the one time we tried to measure it we ran out of heavy things for me to lift. I'm pretty sure that there has to be a limit - that is, I 'think' there is a limit so there will be one, I just haven't encountered it."

"W-why didn't you mention this before!"

"Didn't I?" I thought back to the previous evening. "I suppose we did get a bit sidetracked last night. Then again, I'm not the only one who forgot to mention something." I didn't bother asking if her demonstration in the class had been typical - that was kind of obvious.

Louise humphed irritably and wiped ineffectually at the top of the teacher's desk.

"It is odd - I'm hardly an expert, but you're obviously using magic. If you just weren't able to do that then nothing would have happened at all. I may be biased towards this as an answer, but are you sure you aren't just using too much magic?"

"Why would that matter?"

"I've no idea, does it? I've no training in magical theory so I'm probably not the right person to be asking. I've definitely got that problem with my telepathy - although it's more in the lines of rip someone's mind apart and leave them a drooling vegetable than it is to generate..." I turned around with two more desks in hand and saw Louise had backed up against the blackboard, white-faced and brandishing her wand.

My initial thought was to look behind me. My second thought would have been that turning around while carrying two large desks was not the best of ideas and I should instead use my clairvoyance to look behind me for the threat. Which could have been messy since that would have removed the strength supporting the desks. Fortunately, I don't rely on thinking when instincts are available. And in this case my instincts were screaming a very simple warning:

Talk. Fast.

"I'm speaking hypothetically of course, I've never actually done that. The textbook I got hold of it has some very firm warnings which I take very seriously."

Still white faced. Still trembling. Wand now pointed right at me as I lowered the desks.

"Please don't blow me up, Master. These are the only clothes I have."

Okay, that got to her. It's a bit incongruous for someone that she was apparently thinking of as a...

...um, some sort of lovecraftian monster. I need to work on my public relations.

In any event, concern about something as relatively mundane as keeping my clothes intact and no more in need of laundering than the already are didn't mesh well with her fears and broke the mental impasse. "B-but you could do that?"

"Well... yeah. It's why the prerequisites for anything beyond the most basic psionic classes at Minch are heavily loaded with ethics classes. And from what I've been told the basic classes aren't much more than figuring out how to not get your own mind torn apart by either your fellow TPs or by your own mistakes." I grimaced at the reminder that I should be getting myself set up at Minch this morning and preparing for my own classes, not cleaning up here.

Louise nodded slowly. "I suppose that you're a more impressive familiar than I had thought."

"I'm flattered, Louise." Now that she wasn't pointing her wand at me, I lifted the desks again. "Going back to our earlier topic of conversation, it's possible that you're simply using too much magic for the spell. That's hardly the only possibility, of course, but it's certainly one of them. Alternatively it may be that your talents simply lie in other areas of magic. Have you ever tried to deliberately create an explosion?"

She gave me the sort of look that is usually directed at particularly stupid dogs. "Why would I do that?"

"Have you met Kirche?"

She actually snickered at that. The evil looking grin on her face probably wasn't all that different from that my distant ancestors had worn when they discovered that hitting tigers over the head with crude axes worked better than using their bare hands.

"I do suggest practicing in a safe area, well aware from anything breakable," I added. "Cleaning up a classroom isn't all that bad. If you demolish the dining hall then there might be a few people might be a bit upset." As if prompted by the mention of the dining hall, my stomach rumbled again.

"You're really hungry already?" she exclaimed.

"There's no such thing as a free lunch, Louise," I explained. "My mutant talents are a boon, but they always exact a price. In this case..." I shrugged. "I'd really like to get this over with so I can find the kitchens before lunch is served."

Louise picked up the cloth she was using to clean off the desk with. "Hadn't you better get back to work then?" She then went back to scrubbing, with at least some vigor behind the action, as I went to move the last desk.

.oOo.

It took longer than I expected, although for my first time repairing a window I dare say I make a half-decent glazier. Still, once I'd mopped the floor and Louise had wiped off the desks setting everything out again didn't take too long and Louise was able to point me to the kitchens before she scurried off towards the dining hall.

It felt a little strange parting ways from her and I wondered if it was some effect of the spell she had cast on me when she accepted me as her familiar or if it was simple nerves at being without the one guide I had to this strange world. However, any wavering of nerves was quickly outweighed by a renewed rumbling of my belly and I knocked briskly on the door leading into what Louise assured me was the kitchens.

After a moment the door opened to reveal a girl only a few inches taller than me and wearing a maid's outfit - and it was an entirely proper outfit, I assure you, not some sort of pervy french maid get-up. I'm sure that that disappointed a few people since she wasn't bad looking either. "Hi, is this the way to the kitchens?"

"Oh yes," she agreed. "However they're a little busy right now, since we're serving lunch. Is there something I can fetch you?"

"Well -" My stomach rumbled loudly. "Could you spare any food to a starving familiar?" I asked, clasping my hands in front of me and trying to look innocent and helpless. I admit, being slightly built helped with that although puppy-dog eyes on a girl my own age was a long shot.

Her eyes went wide. "A familiar? Are you by any chance the girl who became Miss Vallière's familiar?"

"Word got around then?" I couldn't say I was surprised. Gossip among the students would naturally spread to the staff.

"A little." She directed a carefree smile at me. "It's become quite a rumour, that a commoner was called by the summoning magic."

It figures that my status as a 'commoner' would be the key item of description. Somehow I had to wonder how they'd have reacted if I was able to demonstrate being a mage. "God bless England." At least we'd gotten past that division, mostly by killing a lot of the nobility off over the years.

"England?" she asked.

"Where I come from." I wiped at my eyes with the back of my hands as if I was on the brink of crying and felt a slight pang of guilt at the stratagem as she wrapped an arm comfortingly around my shoulders and drew me inside.

"There, there, don't cry." The maid pulled a handkerchief out of her pocket and offered it to me. I accepted of course and wiped at my eyes before blowing my nose noisily on it. "We'll take care of you."

"Y-you will?"

"Of course. You said that you were hungry?" Under her guidance I entered what was evidently the kitchen, a large room occupied by quite a number of cooks and maids working on scores of large pots and ovens. The chamber was a hive of industry, but I was led to an out of the way chair in one corner. In a trice, the girl was able to provide me with a large bowl of a rich stew. "Here, this is some stew made from the leftovers of the nobles' meals."

"You're very kind," I thanked her before digging in.

"It's only the staff meal... Oh my goodness!" Her eyes went wide as I started spooning the stew rapidly into my mouth. "Weren't you given anything to eat?"

"Miss Vallière gave me some food at breakfast," I assured her. "It's just... My body is such that I have to eat a lot more than she does and she said I was greedy. But if I don't eat more then I'll fall over and die. Really I will!"

She looked astonished to see that I had almost finished the bowl already, spooning stew into my mouth between words. "We have plenty, if you need seconds."

I scraped the bowl. "You are a life saver, Miss..."

"I'm Siesta." She took the bowl from me. "I serve the nobility here by doing domestic duties."

"My name is Ellen," I introduced myself. "I suppose that I will be doing the same for Miss Vallière in the future since she says she can't send me home."

"Welcome to Tristain Academy of Magic," Siesta said and hugged me around the shoulders again. "I'm sure that you can be happy here." She took the bowl. "Let me get you another bowl."

I was quite genuinely near to tears now. The first bowl had been fairly generous. A second... and maybe a third since Siesta said there was plenty... and I'd count myself as having had a decent meal. Yes, I know it seems shallow, but the first week after my mutant genes activated I withered away faster than an anorexic until mum sat me down and forced me to eat as much as both my brothers put together. (For the record, my brothers seem to feel that leaving the faintest speck of food uneaten is a mortal sin. It would have been forgivable if either of them was fat as a result).

The next bowl was accompanied by half a loaf of bread, much fresher than what I'd been offered for breakfast. That settled Siesta into the category 'friend for life' as far as I was concerned. "Thank you so much," I said, slightly ashamed of how I had taken advantage of her kind-heartedness. "If there's anything at all I can do to help you, just ask." I promised once I had polished off the bowl.

She looked me over and smiled. "In that case, please help me serve the desserts," she said.

"Sure, absolutely." I wiped the bowl clean with what was left of the bread and shoved it into my mouth.

"But you'll have to dress properly," she added with a slightly reproachful look at my jeans and hoodie.

"Um... okay..."


	3. Chapter 3

If my brothers ever somehow get pictures of me wearing a maid's uniform then I will never, ever hear the end of it. Don't get me wrong, they're not awful, but they're constitutionally incapable of keeping their mouths shut, particularly if it's about something that the big goofs think is funny.

Fortunately, wearing a servant's uniform made me the next best thing to invisible in the eyes of the nobles in the dining hall. I walked straight in front of Louise twice and I'm sure she didn't recognise me - or even look twice at myself or Siesta as we moved up and down the tables, me carrying a huge silver tray of dessert cakes while Siesta served them one by one to the nobles with a pair of tongs. Siesta had wanted me to do the serving at first and had been dubious that I would be able to carry the heavy tray, but I was more concerned that I'd commit some horrible faux pas and get her into trouble. The notion that I'd find a few cakes heavy was laughable - of course, she had no way of knowing that.

I recognised a few of the students other than Louise as we walked up and down the tables. Kirche stood out of course, sitting next to the girl who'd ducked out of the classroom to avoid Louise's explosive demonstration. That girl had her nose buried in the book, reminding me entirely too much of my older brother who is a colossal bookworm, rarely out of arms reach of a novel.

Besides those two, I spotted the blond would-be lothario from yesterday, surrounded by other boys and regaling them with some tale. He had left his frilly shirt partly unbuttoned again and a rose in the pocket of the shirt. Now that I thought about it, he had had a similar one the day before. In fairness, he wasn't all that bad looking.

"Who are you going out with now, Guiche?" one boy asked him as we approached.

He touched a finger to his lips. "Go out? I hold no one woman in such special regard. After all, a rose blooms for the pleasure of many."

...and a rose generally has its roots in manure. I bet he'd never state that sentiment in the hearing of a girl he was sleazing after, I thought in disgust. Siesta was serving cakes to the table behind him and I was looking in that direction but I had my clairvoyance active in case someone jostled me from behind - however well my shield protected me, it wouldn't do a thing for the tray or its contents - so as we moved past the conversation I spotted a small crystal vial under his chair. Shifting my hands so that I was holding the tray up with one hand I crouched for a moment, reached back and pulled it out.

The vial contained a small quantity of a purple liquid. Possibly some sort of magical potion, although it looked more like the sort of bottle I'd expect to be used for an expensive perfume. Standing so that Siesta could reach the cake again (she looked deeply worried that I was now holding the tray with only one hand, although it was of course, still perfectly level) I stretched out my other hand with the vial in it. "Excuse me, sir, is this yours? It was under your seat."

Guiche turned his head to look at the vial, although his eyes quickly focused past it on me. "This is not mine," he assured me, with a charming smile. "Why would I, Guiche de Gramont, carry perfume?" There was a snickering from a couple of the boys with him.

"Perhaps on behalf of a lady friend, sir?" I persisted evenly.

"I know my charms must draw you like a moth to the flame, but it is improper for you to approach me in this way," he changed the subject, his smile growing sly.

I withdrew my hand, noticing that Siesta was ready to move on and shooting me a worried look. "I apologise for taking up your time." There was a snickering from behind me as I walked away with the tray and the glass of the vial cracked as my fingers clenched, the potion dripping onto my fingers. My shield must have activated temporarily as my temper flared, useful in this case since otherwise I'd probably have cut myself on the glass. Hopefully whatever was in the little bottle was merely a perfume as the playboy had suggested, it did at least have a pleasing scent.

Siesta pointed out a waste receptacle I could drop the bottle into discreetly as we reached the bottom of the table. "You can't just approach a noble like that!" she warned me in a horrified whisper. "You could get into the most terrible trouble."

I supposed that for her it would be as if I had walked and asked the question of one of the Empire City Guard, or maybe the Fascist Four (back before Dr Diabolik made a laughingstock of them). Unlike the so-called nobility of my homeworld, this bunch of aristocrats really did have something that made them different from those around them. Which didn't make it right, but did make it understandable.

"I've had no need to grovel thus far in my life," I said simply. "Where I come from it's not done. And I don't propose to begin now, for some spoiled brat."

Her expression was one of amazement. "You must have a lot of courage..."

"You're right that I might get into trouble for it," I admitted as we began to move down the tables again, this time on the other side of the table that Guiche and Louise were sat on. "But I have my own pride too, foolish as it might seem."

I honestly didn't think anything further would come of the matter - well, I suppose that I did consider that Guiche might decide to follow up on his odd assumption that I found him attractive - but I truly had no expectation that I'd not manage to go another few minutes without trouble arising as a result of that minor incident. However, we had only moved a short distance along the table before a girl with her hair in tight rolls, the same Montmorency who had stood next to Guiche yesterday after I was summoned, pushed her chair back and glared at me. Blinking at her sudden movement, I did nothing as she sniffed at the air.

"How dare you!"

Her words hardly explained the cause of her ire and I said as much. "Do you shout at everyone like this, Miss Montmorency or am I being especially privileged this afternoon?"

"Did you really think that I would miss the scent of my own perfume?"

Ah, Montmorency the Fragrance. The perfume bottle must have been hers then.

"You must be very proud of yourself to have stolen without being caught, but you were a fool to have used it around me." The irate girl continued, her voice rising a shriek. Her wand was in her hand.

"You're quick to make the accusation, Miss Montmorency." I gestured discreetly for Siesta to back away - the confrontation was drawing a crowd and getting her into trouble would be poor repayment for her kindness. "But there's a perfectly simple explanation that doesn't include any crime on my part."

She sneered. "My perfume, the work of my own hands, it is never meant for a commoner! For you to wear it is a crime against the love I felt as I created that scent!"

"Would this be your love for a Mr. Guiche?"

Her face paled and then flushed red. "You impudent piece of FILTH! I'll flog you within an inch of your life."

I couldn't help but smile. The girl might be a touch larger than I but it was as plain on the nose on her face that she had no experience of the martial arts. "You know, I think I'd like to see you try. Shall we take this outside?"

Siesta gasped, the sound almost lost in dozens of other reactions around the dining hall. The only one I could identify a source from was an indignant squeak from Louise, who had just realised that it was me confronting her classmate.

Montmorency looked me up and down. From the look on her face, she was just about as confident as I felt. "Finish handing out the cakes, maid. I'll be waiting for you in Vestri Court, if your courage lasts that long."

I bowed slightly. "How considerate of you to consider my other responsibilities. I will meet you shortly."

She sniffed again and stalked off, presumably in the direction of this Vestri Court.

Turning to Siesta I saw that she was quivering, and from the look on her face, not with excitement. "Siesta, I'm terribly sorry to ask this after you've done so much for me already -"

"You're..." She gave a great sob and grasped my free hand, clutching it to her breasts. "You're going to get killed!"

"What?"

"If you truly anger a noble..." She broke off, her voice shaking.

It was pretty clear that one of us was badly misjudging the situation and since Siesta knew as little of my capabilities as I knew of Montmorency's I suppose either one of us could have been wrong. I hadn't seen much from any of the mages so far that seemed a threat, even Louise's much feared accident having been pretty trivial, but Siesta's concern reminded me that in honesty, I hadn't exactly seen much of a sample.

I was considering this when Louise arrived, sparing no time in letting me know exactly how she felt about this. "Did you make your brain melt already! What do you think you're doing?"

"Helping to delivering cakes. Would you like one?" I offered her the tray.

"I'm talking about challenging Montmorency the Flood to a duel!"

"Hey, she called me a thief!"

"It doesn't matter. Just apologize to her."

"What! No way! This is not my fault!"

Louise fixed me with such a severe stare that Siesta shrank back and tried to hide behind me, which given I was still holding the tray worked better than it usually would. "Look, I know you think you're strong, but that's not enough. A commoner can't beat a mage."

I admit, that fact that Louise - having a reasonable notion of what I can do - was of the same mind as Siesta wasn't the most heartening thing that I could have heard. "I won't know unless I try, Louise."

"What's this I hear?" Guiche had approached too - if people kept talking to me then I might be quite a while getting to the Vestri Court. "You are to duel Montmorency?" He held his flower to his nose. "What could have brought two such fair flowers to such an impasse?"

"It seems that the perfume under your chair was hers. I spilt some on my hand and now she thinks I stole it from her."

Louise stared at Guiche suspiciously. "Why would Montmorency's perfume be by your chair? Unless..."

I put the tray down on the table. "Unless of course, she gave it to you." Not needing to support the tray any more I let the shield down and listened. Under the circumstances, Guiche rather naturally had Montmorency and her perfume on her mind and I grunted in disgust as I realised that while he was indeed romantically entangled with the girl, he preferred it be kept quiet so that he could flirt with other girls. Such as a first year who'd been in easy earshot when I found the perfume.

"Nonsense," he assured me. "While there is no such relationship, I do have some small influence upon Montmorency. On your behalf I would delight to persuade her of your innocence."

Well that's more than I expected from him.

"Why don't I walk with you to speak to her," he offered. "I can attest that you are innocent of wrongdoing."

I have to give him points: if I hadn't still been reading his mind and he wasn't...

You know, I was a lot less cynical about boys before I knew what they were thinking.

Still... if I didn't have to fight Montmorency... well, that would be good. I guess. Okay, I really liked the idea of kicking some sense into one of these nobles, but it wasn't exactly the sort of behaviour that mum and dad would approve off. "That would be really nice of you."

.oOo.

Montmorency was waiting as we reached the Vestri Court. So were a lot of other students, apparently drawn here in expectation of a spectacle. The court was actually an lawn between two towers that I alter found out represented the elements of Wind and Fire. More importantly, it was on the west side of the academy and the southern tower cast a shadow over it, keeping it comfortably cool despite the warmth of the day.

"So have you come to apologise?" Montmorency asked haughtily.

Rather than reply directly, I looked over at Guiche. "I believe that there was something you wanted to say, Mr. Guiche?"

He coughed and then gripped his rose, apparently drawing strength from the horticultural sample. It takes all kinds I suppose. "My dear Montmorency, it seems there has been some kind of regrettable misunderstanding."

"There is no misunderstanding. This commoner stole a sample of my personal perfume and I caught her wearing it."

"I... I can assure you that she did not actually steal it." Guiche seemed to be sweating slightly. "You see I happened to be nearby when she found it on the floor of the dining room and she was quite unaware of to whom it belonged."

Montmorency nodded slowly. "I see."

There was a ripple of disappointment from the crowd at the thought that the duel would not take place.

"Could you answer one small questions, I have about all of this?" Montmorency asked Guiche civilly.

He nodded.

"Since you were a witness to this surely you could have told her it was mine?" she snapped suddenly. "You liar! You must have been making moves on her, you unrepentant two-timer!"

"Please, Montmorency the Fragrance. Don't twist your rose-like face in anger like that. It saddens me to see it!" Guiche's face was one of put-upon innocence as he addressed her. "I would be beyond me even to think a lie in your presence..."

"That bottle that I gave to you as a sacred trust..." Montmorency was all but trembling with rage. "You'd use as a token to your commoner wh-"

"Don't say something I'd have to kill you for." I kept my voice flat and even. Not that I would kill her, of course, but the sheer mention might deter any further foolishness. I know it's considered Christian to turn the other cheek, but I didn't think there was all that much more of this that I could put up with.

"Don't think that I'm excusing you in this." The girl whirled to glare at me as menacingly as a teenager with a red bow holding her hair in place can be. "I know your type. Setting your sights above your station... I'll give you a lesson in what your place is."

Guiche stepped aside with a shrug, the first sign of good sense I'd seen coming from him. "Obviously she's beyond reason," he said in what could possibly be mistaken for an apologetic tone. "It would seem she does not understand the meaning of a rose's existence."

"I think she understands you very well, Mr. Guiche. Since you're the cause of this with your philandering, perhaps you'd like to be her opponent instead of me?"

"Dueling is strictly forbidden," Louise interjected. "Leave my familiar alone, Montmorency. She's rude and gluttonous and altogether a nuisance but she's not a liar."

"I'm touched by your kind words," I murmured.

Montmorency looked surprised at first. "Your familiar? Oh! Yes, I see now. Well, Louise the Zero, there's something that you have forgotten. What is forbidden is a duel between two nobles. There is no such rule to prohibit a duel between a noble and a commoner."

I rolled my eyes. So much for getting out of this through diplomacy. "Let's get on with this."

"I agree." Montmorency raised her wand. "I'll teach you a lesson in respect for your betters."

"I don't know where you're going to find one." I charged forwards, raising my shields and extending them to protect not only myself but also my clothes. They were borrowed after all.

Montmorency made a stabbing gesture with her wand and an instant before I could lay hands on the girl the ground fell away from my feet. No... the ground didn't fall. I was rising away from it!

"This is called magic, you stupid commoner," the girl gloated, levitating me off the ground and away from her without my having any means of getting close enough to come to grips.

The duel wasn't off to a good beginning...

"Done already?" Montmorency asked with a little laugh and I floated up and down in the air as her wand shifted slightly in her hand. "Did you think I'd just scuffle in the dirt like a peasant? I am a mage and I fight using magic."

Internally I was cursing myself for underestimating my opponent. This was essentially the same magic that Chevreuse had used on me in her class, but here I had no leverage to prevent her from moving me at her will. At most I can stop her controlling my posture, but otherwise...

I had treated this like a dojo spar, when it was actually something very different.

"Now if you want me to release me then I expect you to apologise to me, properly." She smiled at me and not in a friendly fashion. "The first step of that is to get on your knees. Let me help you with that." Her wand flicked and I felt pressure on my legs. Reflexively I used my shield to reinforce the pressure. Now that I had something to compare it to, I was sure that she had been using less force that Chevreuse had, which meant it was no particular problem to resist.

However, that did lead to one small tactical problem for me: the only talent I had that had a reach longer than my arm was telepathy. And aside from moral issues of using it as an attack, I couldn't use it while I had my shields around me.

Montmorency seemed surprised and sweat sprang up on her brow as she twisted her wand again. "Kneel," she hissed.

"Now you see, you didn't say please. That's a touch rude don't you think?"

She seemed quite baffled that my limbs were not complying with her wishes so I let her stew while I tried to figure out how to turn the table on her. Quite frankly, I was a bit worried. If she gave up on forcing me to knees, then I could probably risk lowering my shields which would reasonably give me the opportunity to... well, in theory there were a lot of things if I started rattling around in her head. Practically speaking though, quite a number of them would leave her brain-dead. Blonde jokes aside, I didn't want to do that to her.

Plus I wasn't entirely sure how messing with her mind might affect the spell she was using to levitate me. If it just stopped then the fall wasn't all that much - a few feet wasn't what you might call a problem for me. If left me stuck up here then that would be a bit more of a problem. And that wasn't the only possible outcome. I didn't think becoming a ballistic missile was likely, but it wouldn't be a great deal of fun either.

"Well, you're certainly a stubborn one." Montmorency made a hooking gesture and relaxed slightly. Great, now she'd hung me up here until someone let me down. "I know something that might loosen your tongue." This time her spell had an incantation and a globe of water about the size of a tennis ball formed above her hand.

"Okay you're trying to make me soggy? Not really shaking in fear here."

"Oh it's a little more sophisticated than that." I really didn't like the way the blonde was smiling. Then she produced a small bottle and uncorked it with her thumb, pouring it into the water. The globe took a pinkish hue as trails of the vial's contents dispersed through it. "This is a little creation of mine. Its effects... well, consider yourself fortunate that I'm merciful and diluting it. This way the effects will wear off... in time."

Crud. Super crud. I could guess what was coming next and took a deep breath before thickening up my shields until they were actually airtight.

It would seem that I'd guessed right, but it was little comfort as Montmorency sent the liquid streaming upward, plastering it across my lower face. If I relaxed my shields to let me breath then I'd be letting the stuff into my mouth and that wasn't a risk I felt like taking.

"Montmorency! You're going too far!" Louise had her own wand out and looked about ready to try my proposed experiment of deliberately creating an explosion.

"Why Louise, so quick to jump to your familiar's defense." Kirche seemed not to like the idea that her entertainment be ended through the smaller girl's intervention. "Do you... like her? One might imagine that having a human familiar could lead to you doing... this and that..."

"No!" Her face burned crimson. "Don't be ridiculous! It's just that I won't put up with having my familiar tormented before my eyes."

My breath was growing shorter. Not short as such... I wasn't sure how long I could hold my breath but I was sure that if I passed out my shield would fall and this potion would enter my body. Lord only knows what it would do to me. The girl was a clever strategist, she'd recognised that direct force wouldn't defeat me and thought of a way around it. My pulse was hammering.

"All she has to do is apologise. Two simple words: I'm sorry. Can't you even do that, Familiar of Zero?"

I wiped at my mouth with one hand, scattering most of the potion but it reformed almost immediately. No surprise there. The lack of air was definitely uncomfortable.

"Ellen, I order you to apologise! Right now!" It looked to me as if Louise's gaze softened for a moment. "Your pride isn't worth this."

I wasn't entirely sure that that was true. Then again, there was a great deal that I wasn't sure of. Among them how I was going to get out of this. For some obscure reason I was feeling uncomfortably warm.

"That was an order! How dare you ignore me!"

I cupped my ears as if to indicate I was having trouble hearing Louise. I didn't think she'd believe that I couldn't hear it, but it was an excuse. There had to be a way. I was supposed to be a mage or at least to have some potential for it, wasn't I? All I had to do was learn magic from the first principles in... a few minutes, maybe less.

Down below, Tabitha had taken Louise's wand off her. I wasn't sure if the third Vallière daughter had been about to use magic on me or on Montmorency but either way I was glad someone had stopped her. This was something I had to do for myself.

I wonder if Minch Grammar School would have had a class I could have taken to deal with this sort of thing.

No, I don't have time for letting my mind wander! I have to do something, now! I brushed at my face with my hand again, feeling the liquid against my shield. I...

A smile crossed my face. I knew how I was going to get out of this.

Swiftly I cupped my hands in front of my face, capturing some of the potion between them. With the shield cutting it off, Montmorency couldn't bring it back to my face the way that she could the rest of it. Raising my hands above my head I calculated the trajectory and then pressed my hands together sharply.

A squirt of liquid sprayed across the Vestri Court. Most of it reached the intended destination: right through the lips of my opponent.

There was a somewhat startled expression on Montmorency's face as she realised what she had just swallowed and then she crumpled backwards to the grass.

"Montmorency!" Guiche cried as he dashed to her side. Well I'll be darned, I guess he did care about her after all.

The potion fell away from my mouth and I was able to carefully weaken my shields and breathe once more. 'None sing hymns to breath. But, oh to be without it!' It's from another of my older brother's vast collection of books. I'd never quite grasped its meaning until now as I gasped in mouthfuls of air. The spell holding me up collapsed a moment later and I landed on my feet. I still felt warm and my pulse hadn't slowed any.

"Are you hurt?" Siesta stepped forwards and took my arm supportively. I hadn't spotted her watching the duel but I guess she wasn't exactly going to force her way through the students to get a place at the front. Now that the fight was over however, she was right there to start picking up the pieces. Decent of her. And quite honestly my knees were sagging. I hadn't thought that this was taking all that much out of me.

"I feel fine." Actually I was having trouble focusing my eyes on anything. But surely I'd be back to normal in a minute. Just a little lightheaded from holding my breath for so long. It hadn't exactly been a furious and kinetic conflict after all so I could hardly have exerted myself much.

Louise approached us. "Montmorency must have used a sleeping potion. But what were you thinking not obeying me when I ordered you to stop? I won't have a disobedient familiar!"

"Oh is that what you said?" I smiled brightly, feeling lightheaded. "I couldn't hear you."

"You already told me that your shield doesn't stop you hearing." I missed whatever she said next and a moment later I felt her hand touch my forehead lightly. "You're burning up!"

Burning up. It sure felt like it. No. That was wrong.

I was...

What's the word.

Word

word

Out.

Burning Out.

I was burning out.

Oh, that's not good, is it?

I could have sworn that I heard my name being called as I fell face first onto the grass. Then blackness.

.oOo.

The next thing that I felt was a sudden freezing shock. My eyes snapped open - believe me, that sort of sensation does wonders for your ability to focus, at least in the short term - to see an unfamiliar ceiling and then the faces of Siesta, Louise and - to my surprise - Kirche and Tabitha. There was also someone squealing in surprise. Me, since my skin was advising me that I'd just been dropped into a bathtub of icy cold water.

"Is she better now?" Kirche asked.

Siesta leant over and pressed her cheek against my forehead for a moment. "Her temperature isn't going down."

No kidding and my pulse was still beating like a jackhammer.

"Ellen, can you hear me?"

Of course I can hear you, idiot. You're about six inches from my ear. "Yes," I told Louise rather more succinctly. She was trying to help me, after all.

"You've got some sort of fever. We're trying to lower your temperature."

Oh. Well that explained why I was freezing my tender bits in a bath tub. Tabitha helpfully illustrated her part in proceedings by tapping her wand on a bucket and then levitating it up to tip the contents of it all over me.

"Aaaah!" It was freezing! I swear, there must have been ice crystals in the bath with me! And shocking as the cold was, it did seem to be helping - I did try to put my shields up a bit again in case she tried it again with more ice.

"Stop being a baby," directed Kirche rather heartlessly. "I hope this isn't catching, whatever it is." Yeah, her 'ardent' nature might not survive being doused repeatedly with cold water. Then again, she'd probably have boys lining up for the chance to drop icy water all over her naked body.

I laughed - not heartily, the most I could manage was a weak chuckle. "'s not catching. It's burnout. Heard 'bout it. Only happens to people like me."

Siesta wrung her hands. "Is there anything we can do?"

My mind went to a picture I'd seen of in the prospectus for Minch Grammar School's modern looking 'clinic' that was apparently unable to avoid a case or two of terminal burn out most years. "Can't think of anything."

Louise got right to the point: "Will you be alright?" Then again I'd given her some degree of warning already that my powers could be as dangerous to myself as they were to everyone else if I made a mistake.

I thought about her question. Burnout wasn't something that mutants like to dwell on, so Minch (and presumably other schools) put pamphlets in their welcome packs to tell young mutants about in gruesome detail about what can happen if you overstretch your talents, go through a 'growth spurt' with regard to your Body Image Template or start to manifest Gross Structural Dystrophy. There are six types, ranked Zero through to Five in increasing severity. A severity Zero or One doesn't require any treatment at all. A severity Four means that your life depends on getting emergency medical treatment. Severity Five... don't bother with a doctor, just hope you have your affairs in order. I could feel my eyes closing again, and wondered how long it had been since I'd eaten anything.

Well I was pretty sure this was at least a Two or I wouldn't have passed out. And there wasn't a hope of getting modern medical treatment so... "I don't know," I admitted.

I'm pretty sure that I was crying when I passed out again - certainly my face was wet, but that could have been Tabitha's fault...

.oOo.

Morning light and a growling stomach woke me. Either it was time for breakfast or Heaven had better have a buffet ready.

Opening my eyes revealed I was back in Louise's room, or one so alike that I couldn't tell the difference. I suppose if I was Batman I would have done some sort of super-secret carving on the wood paneling so I could identify it immediately but as you may have guessed, I am not Batman. However, I'm confident that it was Louise's room since she was sitting at the table, fast asleep with her head pillowed on her forearms and a blanket around her shoulders.

From what I recalled I should probably be feeling quite weak. But to be honest, the worst I could say about my condition was that I was quite hungry. In all other respects I felt... good.

I sat up in the bed, carefully folding the blankets around me since I was wearing about as much as I had been when I was dropped in the bath, which was to say nothing. Looking around my own clothes, though not the dress that Siesta had lent me, were sitting on top of the dresser, neatly folded and as best I could tell from the bed, thoroughly laundered. I'd have to ask Siesta to show me the laundry process around here, so I could take on Louise's chores.

As if my thoughts had acted to summon her, a moment later a soft knock at the door heralded Siesta's arrival, carrying a tray of food. She smiled when she saw me. "So you're awake now, Ellen?"

"I'm sorry to have worried you."

"Oh, you can't help being ill," she said blithely, placing the tray on the table next to Louise's head. I made to push the sheets aside to leave the bed but Siesta fixed me with a firm stare. "Ah-ah, you need to take it easy." She lifted a large bowl of thin soup and placed it on my lap along with a spoon. "Please eat. We weren't sure how long you would sleep and Miss Louise was concerned that you might starve."

"She's really been looking after me." I looked over at my master with some gratitude as I spooned the soup up, little caring how warm it was. She'd done as I asked, treated me as a friend and companion. I owed her the same.

Siesta looked solemn. "We all thought that you would die. Miss Vallière insisted you should have her bed and then had a teacher cast a spell of healing on you."

"A healing spell?" I asked between mouthfuls.

"Yes, a powerful magic to help treat injuries or illness. I never would have thought that a noble would insist that it be used on a commoner, even paying for the reagent that was used."

I looked over at Louise. "She's really something special."

Siesta nodded. "But so are you."

I shook my head in disagreement. I'd been overconfident and very nearly got myself beaten by the first move a half-trained mage had thought to use on me. So much for the great martial artist!

"No, you are," she insisted. "Everyone is talking about it in the kitchens! Nobles were always so scary to us commoners, since we couldn't use magic. I - I couldn't do anything about Miss Montmorency but... I'm not so scared any more, Ellen! You won against a noble, though you're a commoner!"

I could feel the truth of her words: the fear that wasn't as gone as she thought but also the new confidence that I would not have associated with her before now. I can't say I'd ever felt much sympathy for Humanity First before and I'm sure that the experience will pass quickly but it occurred to me that Tristain and the rest of this world were very much what they were afraid might be the future: those with 'special powers' dominating those who lacked them. Bigotry and prejudice might cloak it, but at root their fear was not as unrealistic as I would have liked. How many generations were Minch and other schools like it from being just like this?

"I'm glad to hear that, Siesta. I take it that Miss Montmorency has awoken."

Siesta giggled wickedly. "The headmaster, Old Osmond, declared at dinner that she shall have to sleep until the potion wears off and then catch up on all her classes as a punishment for making such a challenge."

"How long...?"

"Just overnight so far, but they say it could be a week!"

"Has Mr. Guiche tried waking her with a kiss?"

More giggles, this time shared between us. This seemed to be the trigger that woke Louise, whose eyes flickered open. She leant back, stretching her arms out and then froze as she saw me. "You're awake?"

"Yes." I bowed my head. "Thank you, my master, for caring for me."

"Humph." She looked at me, then the bowl in my lap and only then at the tray in front of her. "Breakfast?"

Siesta bobbed a curtsey. "Yes, Miss Vallière."

"Oh. Thank you." Louise reached for the cutlery and then fixed me with a stare. "Don't think that this gets you out of your chores. As soon as you're ready to leave my bed I've got a huge load of laundry for you to take care of. And then the room needs cleaning and you're going to help me with my magic."

"Of course." I took a very private pleasure in the way her momentum broke off when I matter of factly accepted the jobs.

"Don't forget, you're my familiar!"

"I wouldn't dream of it." I drained the dregs from the bowl of soup, the bottomless pit that passed for my stomach if not sated then at least momentarily appeased. Hmm. Maybe I could mooch a second breakfast at the kitchens if the laundry was anywhere near there... or failing that some elevenses. Better yet, both! "Right, I'll just get dressed and make a start on that."

Louise gave me a thoughtful look and then shook her head slightly when Siesta moved to prevent me.

"But..."

"She's my familiar," she added very firmly.

I did run into a couple of problems getting dressed though. No not my health, at least not directly. However, no adjustment I could manage would make my bra fit comfortably. Apparently the boob fairy had visited while I was busy burning out.

"Stop playing with them," Louise ordered brusquely, glowering fiercely at my back.

"I'm not playing," I gave up on the bra and set it aside. "This just doesn't fit."

Siesta frowned as she looked at me. "Is it just me or are you a little taller than you were yesterday?"

I looked over at her and then walked over to stand closer, comparing our relative heights against my recollection from yesterday. I was still smaller than her... but not by quite so much. "I think you're right. I'm not sure it's worth the pain, but I guess there are some compensations..."

Louise's glare didn't lighten in the least. "Put your shirt on! You're not to act like Kirche!"

A surprisingly good argument. The t-shirt provided the necessary minimum of decency although frankly I had to wear the hoodie as well before it was obvious I wasn't wearing a bra. Even that felt snugger than usual although that might have been my imagination.

The first person I saw outside the door of Louise's room was a boy about my own age, sneaking out of Kirche's room. What he had been doing there I don't know and choose not to care except to be glad that the walls were apparently quite thick and sound absorbent. In any case his tongue practically fell out of his mouth at the sight of me.

Imagination, yeah.


	4. Chapter 4

After that, things fell into something of a routine for the next week or so, which was probably a good thing since too much excitement would probably have done some nasty things to Louise's blood pressure. Plus another duel might have gone even worse since pretty much every mage at the Academy had seen me drifting helplessly in the air while Montmorency levitated me.

I'd wake around dawn and slip out of the window to practice my martial arts and fret about how much the lack of a sparring partner was causing my skills to atrophy. And then I'd head down for a quick breakfast with Siesta and the other servants before filling a bucket with water from one of the Academy's fountains and bringing it up to Louise's room for her to wash with once I woke her and assisted her in getting dressed. Indoor plumbing didn't seem to have occurred to Tristain at this point, although I was severely tempted to invent it just to be rid of the horrors they called the garderobes.

Then I'd quickly change into a maid's uniform before escorting Louise to her breakfast and sneaking off to the kitchens for a second breakfast myself. Louise pretended to believe I had lost the privilege of eating sat at her feet as a result of the duel with Montmorency, which may or may not have been the belief of the other students but saved face for that individual once she woke up on the fourth day after our duel.

Montmorency, it must be said, was showing all the hallmarks of being a bad loser. Although the way that Guiche seemed quite unable to look away from me any time we were in the same room may have been the cause rather than our duel. His behaviour certainly didn't help the situation and his familiar had actually tried to bite me (although given that Guiche was apparently trying to trade familiars with my master at the time I can't blame the giant mole for being a bit aggressive. I just wish she'd have taken it out on her master and not on me.)

After breakfast I was responsible for the upkeep of Louise's room and possession: otherwise known as cleaning the room and doing her laundry. For reasons of efficiency and keeping time spent on the job to a minimum I alternated days between these. It wasn't as if she didn't have enough clothes that having something sat in the laundry basket for a day was a hardship and she hardly ever... okay, yes I did wind up cleaning up after her magical experiments most evenings. Don't laugh.

Of course, the reason that I was keen to finish these chores quickly was that once those were done I could sit with Louise in her classes. I got a few dirty looks from the professors but there were no rules against familiars attending lessons with their masters - actually it was officially encouraged. Louise was all for it and considerately never sent me off on errands since with my eidetic memory I was able to provide ready assistance on her homework should any little detail have escaped her during the classes. As a result, I was picking up a decent theoretical education on turning water into wine, combining reagents to create special potions, materializing fireballs out of nothing, levitation...

There was however a degree of frustration for both of us: neither of us could do anything practical with these lessons since Louise was still blowing things up every time she tried and I lacked a wand (although given that they aren't common among magi back home I'm uncertain if I'd need one) and more importantly didn't intend to allow anyone (not even Louise if I could avoid it) know that I was increasingly sure that the testers who thought I might have some talent as a mage were right.

Of course, according to Minch's prospectus anyone could learn and use magic, thus their classes on the topic were in theory open to every student. The principal problem was that using magic required the use of 'magical energies' called quintessence (or sometimes just essence) which for most people (mutants included) has to be gathered slowly and tediously through lengthy ritual or some sort of artifact. Some mutants - and I was beginning to suspect that this was essentially what the nobles of this world were - have a natural talent for drawing one variety or another out of the environment around them and using it 'on the fly'. At low levels only fairly trivial magics can be done without preparation but given what I'd seen, all the students here were at least the equivalent of a mid-ranked Wizard, as such mutants are known. And there were thousands of them, for Tristain Academy of Magic was by no means the only school of its kind.

But I digress. The point was that I couldn't practice magic openly and the professors wouldn't allow Louise to practice it in class (or at least, none of them did so twice), which reduced her to attempting them in her room. With the aforementioned need for me to regularly clean up after explosions.

After lunch and more classes I would eat dinner in the kitchen, pack a supper for later and then head back to Louise's room where we'd work together on her homework. And then, turned loose by my generous master for a whole hour before bed, I'd find an empty classroom and work through more kata. It wasn't much, but hopefully it would keep me from losing too much of my edge - frankly, adjusting for the sudden gain in height of an inch and a half was bad enough without getting slack about regular practise.

The end of the week however was marked by the Day of Void and in the absence of classes this was a day that Louise had marked down as suitable to practice magic in a safe fashion. Which was to say, well away from the Academy itself.

Preparations had been carefully planned and executed. There were two horses being made ready for us at the stables and Siesta was personally seeing to the preparation of a suitable picnic basket. All we had to do was leave early on in the morning, collect the basket, go directly to the stables and ride for an hour or two until a suitable clearing in Tristain's extensive forests presented itself.

We got about three paces from Louise's room before this went wrong.

"Aha!" Kirche declared for the benefit of her audience. "I knew you'd try this, Louise the Zero!"

The audience (Tabitha) turned a leaf of her book, apparently present only because Kirche had a firm grasp on the lapel of her pyjamas.

"Try what?" Louise paused. "And stop calling me that, Kirche the Strumpet!"

The insult washed over Kirche like water off a duck's back. "Don't try to disguise it, Louise. I saw your familiar's breasts when she was ill. And then the very next day they had grown! Now you're going to use that same magic on yourself, how shameless!"

...what twisted ways did that girl's mind work! Did it work at all, in fact?

"We're doing nothing of the sort!" Louise declared. "It would take a loose woman like a Zerbst to come up with an idea like that!" Sadly, I could see a speculative look in her eyes suggesting she wasn't as opposed to the idea as all that.

"Hah! Of course you would say that!" Kirche crossed her arms under her bosom. "That's why we're coming along, to learn this secret ourselves rather than let you keep it selfishly to yourself, Louise!"

I risked lowering my shields long enough to slip a message into Louise's mind: 'play along until we get to the stables, then leave them in the dust'.

Of course, what I hadn't planned on was Tabitha having a familiar who could fly and carry both of them.

.oOo.

I noticed the ley line by the tingle as we joined it. Somewhat unsurprisingly, the road Louise picked for us to follow was on one. Whether you call them ley lines, dragonlines or veins of the earth (a phrase I heard from a friend of my father's and took a liking to) there's often a degree of congruence between then and paths or roads. Which came first is open to debate if you're one of the people who like wondering if the chicken or the egg came first.

I'd not been particularly sensitive to them before my mutations became active, but subsequently they'd almost driven me crazy, like an itch I couldn't scratch until Sifu Kwei (I'm not sure if that that was really his name, he was a ridiculously huge David Carradine fan) explained them to me. It was noticing them that was the main reason I got noted down as a possible Wizard during power testing.

Given that ley lines are exceptional flows of magical energy you'd think that mages would stick to them wherever possible but frankly, they're obscenely dangerous and a mage trying to tap them directly is almost certain to wind up frying herself. I'm not sure how highly rated a Wizard would have to be in order to tap into them safely. Probably higher than a Five. The notion of Louise actively trying to create a magical explosion on one wasn't appealing so as soon as we had travelled a decent distance, doing our best to ignore the aerial pursuit, I suggested leaving the road.

"Why?" Louise asked bluntly. "There's a perfectly good clearing beside the road in another hour or so. I remember passing it before."

I rubbed at my rear end ruefully. I'm not really one of those horsey girls and this was only my second time riding a horse (if you count one afternoon pony-trekking five years ago as the first). While I was doing my best to imitate Louise's posture either I was doing something wrong or it was always this uncomfortable. "I think this would be best tried off the road. Just in case someone was passing by at the wrong moment."

She looked back with a sour expression. "Do you think we could lose them in the trees?"

I shrugged. Even with a delay for Tabitha to get dressed they had caught up with us almost before we lost sight of the Academy buildings. "I'd suggest blowing them up, but the dragon seems relatively inoffensive." Actually, Tabitha didn't particularly bother me either as from what I'd seen I wasn't sure she'd even notice if we evaded them. However with Kirche as the driving force behind them nothing short of physical violence seemed likely to deter the group.

With a nudge of her heel and a gentle tug on the reins Louise steered her horse off the road, slowing down to negotiate the rougher ground (not that the road was anything to write home about). I gave the same signals and was somewhat elated that my own ride obeyed.

"So what is it about Kirche that annoys you so much, master? I'm not all that fond of her myself but it seems more personal for you."

Louise humphed. "That woman isn't Tristainian, she's a noble from Germania." I'd managed to get a glance at a map while we were planning this so I knew that Germania was a neighboring kingdom, more or less to the east. A much larger kingdom, just like Gallia to the south. I had to suspect that Germania and Gallia had found Tristain a convenient battlefield in the past - sort of like Belgium being caught between France and Germany. "I told you already that my family's estates are on the Germanian border so we're first on the field against them the moment any war starts."

I nodded to show my understanding. "Are there many Germanians at the Academy?"

"No, just Kirche. She got thrown out of every school in Germania for her behavior." Louise nodded judgmentally. "She's a Zerbst, so what can you expect? They're a low unworthy family. Kirche's great-great-grandfather stole away my great-grand-father's lover around two hundred years ago."

That was an awfully long time ago for someone only four generations removed. Either some of Louise's family had lived for a very long time or she was being a bit imprecise. "Let me guess, the Zerbst family estates are just across the border and they're first to fight you when a war starts?"

"Exactly! We've lost count of how many family members we've lost over the years."

According to my grandmother, her husband's family had had a barony a few centuries ago, up on the Scottish border only to lose it because they wouldn't stop picking fights with other border lords after the Stuarts inherited the throne of England and both Kingdoms were supposed to be united. I imagine that this was more or less the same sort of feud with ample atrocities on either side to justify further 'retaliation'.

As it happened we only had to ride about another twenty minutes before a hillock in the forest caught my eye, the remains of what had clearly been castle walls a century or two ago visible. "That looks promising."

Louise followed my pointing finger. "That ruin? I thought we were looking for a clearing?"

"I can make a clearing anywhere we need it. What we need is a good vantage point and with a little work that will do nicely."

Louise's brow furrowed and then she looked at the trees again. "Oh."

We dismounted and while Louise handled securing the horses by their reins so that they could graze (or forage? I wasn't sure of the terminology) around one side of the hillock, I walked around it and started rearranging the forest. It actually didn't take all that long to tear a tree out of the ground but they were sufficiently closely spaced that actually bringing them down was tricky until I'd cleared a couple of them and had plenty of space to turn them on their sides.

That, of course, was when a ton or so of blue dragon decided that I was kindly making a landing zone for it and parked itself where I was about to put a tree. Then it licked my face - I had my shield up so I didn't technically get the slobber on me, but it's the principle of the matter. "Oh. Hello."

"Where's Louise?" demanded Kirche as she dismounted.

"On the hill." There wasn't much point lying since short of knocking her out, she'd find Louise sooner or later. "You do realise you're hounding after something that doesn't exist?"

Kirche made a grab at my chest, which I avoided. "You can't expect me to believe that they grew like that overnight without magic!"

I couldn't? Damn, that was pretty much my entire defense. Besides it's not as if she needed breast enhancement. I hadn't grown more than a cup size or so, which didn't leave me in any danger of rivaling her unless I kept growing. "I just had a growth spurt. I'm reasonably sure that you're familiar with them."

"A magical growth spurt!" Kirche took out her wand and then started flying up the hill. I'm astonished that any of the girls at the school would do that given that the uniform skirts are so short.

"Is she like this much?"

Tabitha didn't reply.

"Would you mind moving your dragon?"

No answer.

"I'm going to put a tree down where you're sitting whether you move or not," I bluffed.

Tabitha looked up from her book and gave me a blank stare. I pulled a tree up by the roots illustratively. She nodded and nudged the dragon to walk out of my way. Once it was gone, I dropped the tree and started snapping off the branches. I was almost done by the time I heard Louise shouting at Kirche. "Are they always like that?"

For a moment I got no response, which was pretty much what I expected, but then Tabitha murmured: "Mostly." She then added: "Familiar?"

"What?"

She looked slightly irritated that I hadn't understood her question. Perhaps she was getting close to the end of her daily quota of words. "You're strong."

"Wh- Oh! Am I this strong because I'm a familiar?"

Tabitha nodded, returning her attention to the book.

"No, it's related to how I fell ill after the duel," I told her, hoping that this would satisfy her. Actually, although I had at first simply been grateful that I had survived the burnout, the changes that had taken place had been preying on my mind. Physical changes in appearance usually only meant one of two or three things for a mutant: some sort of shapeshifting ability; emergent GSD; or manifesting Exemplar traits. All would have problems associated with them. For example, if I was a Shifter and couldn't keep it under control my reflexes and co-ordination would be shot. And I had more than a little concern about how the Tristainians would react if I was visibly non-human. My status was dubious enough as it was, with most of them just thinking of me as an odd servant of Louise's.

Of the options, the best would be if I was an Exemplar: my body changing to mirror some idealised (and usually superhuman) image in my subconcious. But from what was said during my power testing at the police station, that was highly unusual for a PDP although the tester hadn't given me any explanation as to why. If that was the case, I just hoped that I didn't wind up looking like Kirche. I have no idea how she managed to stay upright with those melons on her chest.

When I was finished moving trees there was a clearing about sixty metres long leading away from the hillock. Five trees marked roughly equal increments along it and at the end I'd stacked three tree trunks and most of the branches and so forth. It made a decent sized heap.

Then I ran up the side of the hill and hopped over what was left of the wall on that side. This side was fairly steep but if you know what you're doing you can find handholds on most natural surfaces... and if you can find a handhold and you're moving fast enough you can usually use it as a foothold instead. It's not exactly the sort of thing you see in bad kung fu movies, which are mostly wire work. Actually it's probably more like parkour, which I'd seen on television a couple of times although I'd never lived anywhere in easy reach of a club that could teach it.

The castle hadn't been huge - a cluster of six towers around three sides and a hall on this side but when it had been brought down - slighted is the technical term I think - most of the walls had simply been pushed off the sides of the hill. I wouldn't have been surprised if the resultant rubble had then been pilfered for building the Academy. However, as a result the actual floor was fairly intact and not heaped with too much rubbish.

Kirche was lounging on one of the stones, pushing her chest out every time Louise looked in her direction. If i didn't know better I'd think she was treating Louise like the boys she usually flirted with... which had all sorts of implications that I would prefer not to think about. For her part, Louise was walking back and forth, glaring impatiently in the direction of the ruined gatehouse and the path up to it from where the horses had been left.

"What's keeping her?" Louise muttered.

"Maybe she's charitably teaching Tabitha how to make her breasts larger," Kirche suggested.

"This has nothing to do with making my breasts grow!"

I cleared my throat. "Master? The clearing is ready."

Both girls looked sharply in my direction. "How did you get up here?" Louise asked. "I didn't think you could fly."

"I climbed, master. It's not that difficult." I made a mental note to ask her more about familiars. What Tabitha had said suggested that there could be more to being Louise's familiar than I had expected.

She rolled her eyes. "Fine, let's begin."

We walked up to the edge and looked down over the clearing, Kirche's eyes following us curiously. Louise took out her wand. "The pile of wood at the end?"

I glanced down and saw no sign of Tabitha or her familiar. Glancing up a shape was moving in the sky. "That might be a little ambitous for the first try, master. Let's try the nearest distance marker first." We hadn't found a spell that intentionally created explosions so Louise was instead going to attempt the most destructive spell that she had learned in class.

She pointed her wand down into the clearing, towards the nearest of the trees I had felled. "Fireball!"

The result was not a fireball but it did reduce a fair amount of tree-trunk to woodchips. Unfortunately it was one of the trees to one side of the clearing rather than the distance marker.

Kirche laughed. "Another failure from Louise the Zero, but what should I have expected?"

"Not bad for a first attempt," I told the crestfallen Louise who had been sure that she would manage a fireball properly. "The power was excellent and you weren't far off from distance. A little work on direction next, I think."

"Eh?" The Germainian girl shook her head. "Don't think you can fool me! You act like you're just making explosions, but the minute I turn around you'll be making Louise's chest bigger. I'm going to be right here. Bosoms are the right of all women, not only of Tristainians!"

...well that explained her motivation. At least she wasn't planning on using the spell she was imagining on herself. "Louise, don't use that spell on Kirche until we're sure you won't hit the picnic basket."

"But I don't know a spell that makes brea- Oh, the fireball." Louise blushed.

Kirche sat straight upright. "Wait, what about after she can aim it!"

"That would between you and my master," I told her matter-of-factly. Louise seemed lost in a fantasy world and was giggling in a rather worrying way. "Master? Next shot?"

Louise stepped up to the edge of the castle and cast again, blasting a hole in the forest floor. It was closer to the target though so I chalked that one down as progress.

.oOo.

After a few more tries, Louise did manage to hit the distance marker. In fact once she got the hang of it she blasted every tree I'd felled until there wasn't a piece larger than a toothpick.

"You're doing very well," I congratulated her as she stood triumphantly looking at the blasted forest floor, which looked rather as if an artillery barrage had torn it up. In a way I suppose that that is precisely what had happened. She didn't look physically tired but at the same time I did get a sense of weariness about her - perhaps she was reaching the limits of her use of essence for the day. "Just one more thing and then I think we should call it a day."

"What more is there?" Kirche asked boredly. "I think she's destroyed everything down there."

"A little more work on precision," I explained. "I'm going to set up one more target, master. Once I give you the signal, please try to hit the target without hitting anything else."

With that said I scrambled over the castle wall and descended the side of the hill at a run, which was quite a rush although I was glad to be wearing jeans and trainers rather than a skirt. I'd gotten pretty much used to the long skirts of the maid uniform but it wasn't the sort of thing to wear for athletic activities.

I picked out the upper half of a tree that Louise had blasted down, stripped it down until it was passable as a stake and walked forward to plant it not much further from the castle than the first distance marker was. I'd had a good look at Louise casting magic by standing near her and I was pretty sure I could replicate it - the energy seemed to have flows - if I assembled enough essence. Whether I'd manage a fireball or an explosion of the kind Louise almost inevitably seemed to produce was an open question.

So having satisfied myself, I had one more question to answer that was pretty much for Louise's benefit. Well, two questions. One was what the magical energy was doing at this end of the spell. The other was how much control she would have at this end now that she had managed to get at least rudimentary control of the explosives (my instincts were practically screaming that we were barely touching the lowest rungs of her potential).

And so I'd decided to give her some motivation.

Standing next to stake I gave Louise a wave that she should cast the spell.

Nothing happened for a few moments and then I heard a shout of: "Get away from the target, stupid!"

I cupped my hands around my mouth. "Just do it!"

There seemed to be an arguement up in the castle, Louise trying to get Kirche to do something. Probably to come down here and reason with me. Or just to levitate me out of the way. I made a mental note to ask Louise why she thought shouting at someone would make them more compliant. I amused myself by wandering around the target, punching lightly at irregularity in the wood. I kept my shields down - punching while they were up was like using a knuckle duster even when I held back - but my clairvoyance up as I really did not want to miss Louise starting to cast.

I should point out that while the explosion from her attempt to transmute rocks into metal had been significantly less damaging than the attacks she'd been throwing around I don't exactly know the limits of my shields when it comes to protecting me so I wasn't planning on just standing there and taking the hit. But Louise didn't know that and I guess she was worried about her foolhardy familiar. It's kind of sweet in a patronising way.

Given the choice between coming down after me and starting to cast, Louise opted for the magical solution. Rather decently she sent down a warning shot first, which missed me and the target by the proverbial country mile.

"That was pathetic," I shouted up at her, raising my shields. "I score you as zero!"

The next one drilled into what was left of the tree with pinpoint accuracy. I could practically see the magic flowing into it. And then I reached out and took the magic.

The tree didn't explode.

For an instant I wasn't entirely sure that I wouldn't though.

.oOo.

For the record I am probably entirely too trusting of my instincts when it comes to this sort of thing.

This was what I was thinking as I grabbed hold of enough magic to damn near vaporise my own body mass of oak without having thought of what I was going to do with it. My intention as far as planning went, was to maybe siphon of just enough to attempt to shield myself from the full force of the explosion. And then what might, for want of a better word let's call my hindbrain presented with an image of 'this is how to grab the whole lot and not have a rather large explosion happen right next to you.'

I am perhaps a little too prone to act on impulse, not second-guessing my instincts.

The first thing a mage is taught, wizard or not, is to never ever draw on magical energies without knowing exactly what you intend to do them, even it it's just storing a little for later use. Energy is not static. If you have a purpose in mind, it will go with that. If you don't have one then it will do something. Most wizards break that rule at least once. It's the leading causes of death for mutants with that particular talent, right ahead of other mutants and supernatural beings (which tend to trade the second and third places on that list).

Fortunately, I had an example of a spell recently reinforced in my mind.

Unfortunately for the forest, that spell was a fireball.

The forest vanished from sight in flames and for a long, long moment I choked, trying to suck in air that wasn't what you might call fresh. My shields held back the fire from my skin and clothes but I can't deny that the burning heat was palpable even through that.

Air rushed in as the first flames died, stripped of fuel by their own efficiency. Around me was blackened grass and woodchips most smoking and in some cases the orange glow of embers that suggested that more fires in the future. Around this area dozens of trees were on fire, something that I hoped didn't spread, and soot marks were visible on the remaining walls of the castle.

If I hadn't known that it had been slighted years before the evidence of my eyes might have led me to believe it's current shattered state was the result. There was no sign at all of Louise or Kirche and a thrill of fear rushed through me. I broke into a run, shaking off my disorientation as I thought back to my first aid training, specifically how to treat burns.

As I climbed the hill I heard the neighing of panicked horses (can't blame them under the circumstances) and then Kirche's voice. "Louise! Louise! Oh... Louise..."

Yes I know what that sounds like. I can assure you it didn't sound like it to me. Although under less serious circumstances seeing Louise laid out on the ground, Kirche kneeling over her and both showing more skin than usual (even by Kirche's standards) would have raised my eyebrows a bit.

"How is she?"

"A bit scorched - she's more passionate than I had realised."

What?

"Her breasts haven't grown at all though."

Perhaps due to being more accustomed to working with fire or possibly because she had been a bit further from the centre of the fireball, Kirche didn't seem to have been hurt. Louise, on the other hand was unconscious although fortunately her pulse and breathing were fine. She looked like she'd have the mother and father of all sunburns though, which would probably not make me her favorite person when she woke up.

Absent anything immediate I could do for Louise (after-sun lotion? I wish!) I checked for the last member or members of the expedition, depending on whether the dragon counted separately from Tabitha or not. Fortunately there was a rustle of wings and the pair of them descended down to settle onto one of the ruined towers. Tabitha directed a mild glare down at me: "Updraft," she said reprovingly. I suppose that was her way of complaining that the fireball had affected the air that she had been flying through.

"Sorry about that. Does it look like the fire will spread? I don't want a forest fire on my conscience." I've never come across one of course but I've seen news items on them from America and it almost always seems that someone has died in them.

.oOo.

The horses had broken their reins and run away, so in addition to Tabitha putting out the fires that had been started, we would also depend upon her dragon Sylphid to carry us back to the Academy. And of course, Louise would be accounted responsible for the horses if they didn't return of their own accord. I've no idea how expensive horses are, but it seems likely that no one would be too pleased at losing a pair of them.

All in all, in every way save in polishing Louise's aim, the expedition had been a near to total disaster. Oh and confirming to myself that I apparently was a Wizard and of sufficently high rating to be a danger to both myself and those around me. Yay.

Kirche apparently saw no reason to curb her tongue. "It stands to reason, Louise, that you would manage to turn even successfully casting a spell into a catastrophe."

"Shut up!" Louise's harsh tone had about the impact on Kirche that you'd expect: none at all.

"Poor planning on my part," I told them. "However Louise is hardly at fault for that. In fact this was something of a triumph."

Kirche and Louise turned their heads to look at me in disbelief (I was sat at the back of the little line of girls on the back of Sylphid) at that assertion. I admit it took a certain amount of willpower to keep my face steady as I said it but it was true after a fashion.

"If I understand it correctly duels between nobles are forbidden at the Academy", I pointed out. "Under other circumstances they're almost commonplace?" Which sounded as if it should be killing nobles off left right and centre, but who was I to judge? "Now that my master can use her magic with some degree of control she is not defenseless should someone challenge her to a duel."

"She blew up half the forest!"

"Feel free to tell everyone about that. It should serve as a deterrent." I decided risking lowering my shields - Kirche would certainly know of my unusual strength and resilience but I didn't think she had enough information to determine the mechanics of it yet - was an acceptable risk. And yes, I do consider Kirche a risk. She's unpredictable and that can be a very serious problem. 'Louise, the fire wasn't your fault, it was a mistake on my part.'

I could feel the sudden tension in her. 'I can tell them that if you want.'

Now her feelings shifted towards the negative and I very carefully reached deeper. Having her familiar mess with her magic was bad enough without it being bandied around.

'Alright, I'll keep it quiet then. Now, do you remember the two theories I had? That you might be too powerful for the spells you are being taught or that your skills lie with another kind of magic?' I felt a degree of affirmation. 'I suspect that both may be true. That was an extremely powerful fireball.'

'It was, wasn't it?' Louise's mental tone was smug, but it was the fact that she was replying in verbalised thought that surprised me enough to break off the telepathic contact sharply by snapping my shields up. It took me a long moment of assessment to assure myself that she hadn't been projecting the comment herself, merely responding to my comment actively rather than passively letting me read her reply from her mind.

Is that normal?

I didn't have a clue. Was I changing Louise? My eyes flicked to the markings on the back of my left hand, their meaning unknown to me. I'd been branded somehow and I still didn't know if there were other effects.

"Look."

My contemplation was broken by Tabitha's voice and she even broke off from her book to point forwards. Figuring it must be something fairly apocalyptic to produce that sort of reaction, I obeyed her instruction. In the distance, only partially visible as a result of the sun being only partially visible over the horizon, was Tristain Academy of Magic's central tower.

And something equally towering that hadn't been there this morning.

"What the hell is that?"

"It's an earth golem!"

"What's a golem?"

Louise leant back against me. "A giant moving statue. But what is it doing at the Academy?"

The golem raised one fist and slammed it against the side of the tower, somewhere around the fifth floor.

"Isn't it obvious, Louise?" Kirche called almost happily. "It's attacking!"

"Well of course that's obvious now," my master muttered irritably, drawing her wand. "We have to do something."

"It must be Fouquet the Crumbling Dirt," guessed the fire mage seated in front of Louise. "I wonder how handsome such a famous mage is."

"Who... never mind," I changed my mind quickly. It would probably take too long to explain, becase Tabitha was urging Sylphid to fly faster and faster.

"He's the most famous thief in Tristain," Kirche waxed lyrical. "He's stolen magical items from all over the country from the best defenses Tristainan nobles have been able to set up and he always leaves a message to show he was responsible for the crime!"

"A powerful mage?"

"Look at that thing, he must be at least a triangle class!"

I thought that over. "Maybe it's Professor Chevreuse in disguise."

"No no!" Kirch shouted. "He's here for the most prized treasure at the Academy, my heart. Here I am darling! Wait for me!"

I palmed my face. "Oh dear god." Then I looked over Louise's shoulder. "Master, you've had a busy day, maybe we should leave this to the teachers?"

Her grip tightened on her wand and she shook her head, hair flailing in my face.

Somehow I hadn't thought she'd go for that. "You might want to see what Tabitha wants then, since this is her familiar we're riding on."

Louise looked at the golem, which the dragon was making a beeline towards. "I think she has the same idea that we have." The golem had turned and as we watched it jumped over the outer wall of the Academy. I could just barely make out what looked like someone standing on its shoulder. If that was someone... I did some quick calculations... that golem would have to be around a hundred feet tall and could easily weigh thousands of tons! I hadn't hit a limit to what I could carry but I'd never even considered trying to lift something the size of a small ship. And I don't recall any advice from any of my teachers on how to fight something that size.

Fortunately I wouldn't be doing it in the dark as although the sun was disappearing from view the moons (yes, there were two moons which was pretty solid evidence if I needed it that this was nowhere near home) were provided quite a decent amount of light.

Sylphid banked towards the golem. A staff and two wands rose with intent to use magic, Kirche protesting as she pulled her wand out of her cleavage - something about Fouquet running out on her and being the worst sort of male. I wasn't paying much attention to her, honestly. Tabitha was the first to cast a spell, chanting an incantaion that conjured a whirlwind to strike the golem. Unfortunately it had no effect and nor did Kirche's fireball.

Louise also cast fireball although to no one's surprise, the result was an explosion on the surface of the Golem, rather smaller than those that Louise had used earlier on. It did blow a small chunk out of the golem's chest, which was quite impressive in my book considering the lack of effect from the other spells. And the 'small chunk' was about the size of a bathtub.

The golem took another few steps, as if to say 'I'm not hurt. No really, 'tis but a scratch' and then crumbled abruptly into a large mound of dirt.

"That is the power of the Vallière family!" Louise declared smugly as Sylphid circled the dirt.

I scanned the ground searching for the person I'd seen standing on the golem. Nothing. Something told me that this wasn't dealt with yet.

.oOo.

It turned out that I was right. The aftermath of the attack kept the staff too busy for anyone to question Louise's assertion to the stable staff that the horses had been scared away by the golem. She came up with that all on her own and was very plausible - I was taking mental notes because clearly Louise had a great deal to teach me in the important field of lying to adults (it's a very marketable skill as the professions of politican and lawyer go to prove). Nonetheless Louise was called to the headmaster's office before breakfast and given that Tabitha and Kirche were also present there was a degree of cold sweat involved.

However, it turned out that the three students had been summoned as witnesses to the attack, or as it more accurately might be described: the theft. I followed Louise but was not in a position to bear witness directly since as a familiar I was... well, would you ask a pet cat to give testimony? Apparently the same logic applied to me which was more than a trifle annoying but I decided this wasn't the time to make an issue of it.

When we arrived, one of the professors I hadn't met was ripping into Chevreuse. "You were supposed to be on duty last night! Am I right?"

She broke into tears, which was rather embarassing. I still held by my theory that she might be Fouquet but if so she was a decent actor. "I'm sorry... very sorry."

"Even if you cried your heart out, would it come back? Or are you going to pay for it?" The man would have been an excellent choice for the role of Snape in the Harry Potter films: tall with long black hair and affecting a pitch black cape. His manner was even similar although that was perhaps due to the circumstances.

"But..." The woman fell to her knees, tears still streaming down her face. "But I just finished paying for my house."

The door behind us opened and I stepped aside smartly to let the headmaster sweep into the room. He certainly looked the part of a powerful wizard with a long grey beard. Wearing a hat he'd make an excellent Gandalf or in flourescent robes, Dumbledore. "This is not the best time to be hard on the ladies, hmm?"

"But Osman, Mrs. Chevreuse failed in her duty!" protested the man. "She was sleeping soundly in her bed when she was supposed to be on watch!"

The old man striked his beard thoughtfully, looking at professor. "Er... what was your name again?"

"It's Kaita!" he snapped, redfaced. "Have you forgotten?"

Funny, he didn't look like a dwarf. "Oh, yes, Kaita. That's right isn't it?" Apparently unperturbed by his apparent lapse of memory, Osman pulled out his pipe and started stuffing it with tobacco. "Well Mr. Kaita, don't be so angry. Honestly, how many of us here can say that we are always vigilant for every moment of our time on watch?"

There was an embarassed silence and several teachers hung their heads.

"Well, what's done cannot be undone. In terms of responsibility, I think all of us - myself included - have to be held accountable. Why did we think a thief could never infiltrate the academy? Because of the number of mages present here gives us the assurance that we have numbers on our side. But numbers have never been enough to stop Fouquet and our complacency gave him the courage to trespass and steal the Staff of Destruction."

Well that sounded like a nice, innocent thing that would never cause any problems in the wrong hands...

Chevreuse stood up again, apparently bolstered by the headmaster's support. Although the fact that the old man took the opportunity to play grabass - in front of students! - suggested that he might have had personal motives for aiding her. "Well then, who were the ones who witnessed the theft?"

Colbert, who had summoned us, indicated the three students with a wave of his hand. He also gave me a thoughtful look that I didn't know what to make of. I'd have expected him to be annoyed at me for knocking him down on our first meeting, but I didn't get that impression at all. Easing myself gently into his thoughts, the focus of them seemed to be a blurry image of the runes that had been burned into the back of my hand when Louise claimed me as her familiar.

"Ah yes. Kirche the Ardent, Tabitha the Snowstorm and Louise t- er, Vallière."

Louise glared at the headmaster for his lapse in almost using the nickname as if it where her runic name (something that she officially lacked as I understood matters).

Osman lit his pipe and started to puff on it. "Please tell us about the event in depth."

Louise stepped forwards to act as the spokeswoman for the three. "We were returning from practising in the forest when we saw a great clay golem standing next to the tower. It smashed a hole in the wall and after a moment escaped over beyond the school walls. We cast magic at it and my spell caused it to collapse into dirt. We didn't see anything that could have been the Staff of Destruction though."

I leant forwards and reminded her in a whisper that I had seen someone on the golem.

"Yes, and my familiar thought someone was riding the golem but we didn't see anyone after it broke apart."

"Hmm. So that is what happened." Osman stroked his beard and then put his pipe down. "Mr. Colbert, where is Miss Longueville?"

"I'm not sure," the bald mage replied. "I haven't seen her since early this morning."

"Where could she be during these trying times?"

As if summoned by the words the door opened again, admitting a rather pretty woman wearing spectacles and her hair in a bun. It seemed she was aiming for the sexy librarian look and achieving it.

"Miss Longueville! Where have you been?" asked Colbert anxiously. "There has been terrible news!"

Rather than replying directly, Longueville directed her words to Osman. "I'm extremely sorry to be late! I was carrying out an investigation so..."

"Investigation?"

"Yes. When I woke this morning I was told right away of the attack and visiting the vault I saw that Fouquet had left an inscription on the wall, as is his custom, boasting of the theft. Therefore I immediately began investigating to see what I could learn of any suspicious activity that might lead to the infamous thief."

Colbert looked impressed by her diligence. "You're really very efficient, Miss Longueville. But in the end, did you find anything?"

"Why yes." She smiled blandly. "I believe I have determined the whereabouts of Fouquet."

"What! How did you manage to obtain this information, Miss Longueville?"

"According to the commoners around the area, they saw what seemed to be a person wearing a black hooded cloak entering an abandoned house in the nearby forest yesterday. As the weather has been quite clement, such a cloak would not be needed except for concealment so I think that the person is most likely Fouquet and that the abandoned house is most probably his hideout."

"A black hooded cloak?" Louise looked at me questioningly.

I shrugged. "It's possible. I didn't get a good look at him. Or her."

"How far away is this house from here?" Osman asked.

"By foot it takes half a day," Longueville told us. "But by horse it should only take four hours."

"We must report this to the royal court right away! We must seek reinforcements from the royal army!" suggested Colbert loudly.

Osman shook his head firmly. "You fool!" he shouted, causing Colbert to shrink back. "By the time we report this to the royal court, Fouquet would have made his escape. Besides if we can't even handle such a small problem on our own then we're not fit to be called nobles! The staff was stolen from the academy and it is the academy that will retreive it! Our reputation is at stake!" He broke off and coughed, the tirade apparently having strained his throat. "Now, we're going to organize a search team to find Fouquet," the headmaster declared when the fit had passed. "Those willing to join, please raise your wands."

There was an uneasy silence as the nobles looked at each other waiting for someone to make a move.

"No one? That's perculiar," Osman commented after a moment. "No one wants to be known as the hero who caught Fouquet the Crumbling Dirt?"

That was rich given his own staff wasn't exactly being raised, but it did convince one noble to put her wand in the air. "Master?"

"Miss Vallière!" exclaimed Chevreuse. "You mustn't do this! You're still a student Please leave this to the teachers!"

"Who else is there?" I asked, putting one hand on Louise's shoulder supportively. I wasn't sure this was a good idea, but I wasn't going to undermine her now. "None of you are volunteering and at least my Master has faced Fouquet's golem before."

Another wand rose beside us. "Well I simply can't let the Vallière family take all the glory," Kirche drawled. A moment later Tabitha's staff was lifted. "You don't need to, Tabitha," Kirche said, looking slightly embarassed. "This does not concern you at all."

"I'm worried," Tabitha said quietly, cutting off further objections from the fiery Germainian although Louise mumbled a grudging thank you.

There was a laugh from Osman. "Well then, we shall place our faith in the three of you then."

"Sir!" Chevreuse protested. "Headmaster Osman, I strongly object! We must not put the lives of students in danger!"

He cut her dead with a stern: "Well, would you go in their stead, Mrs. Chevreuse?" and left her stammering about her health. "As Miss Vallière's familiar has pointed out, they have faced Fouquet before and even though Miss Tabitha here is very young, I have heard that she has already received the title of Chevalier."

Everyone looked at Tabitha in astonishment. I didn't know exactly what that meant although I guessed it was about equivalent to being knighted back in the middle ages. (Actually, it was much more than that. Chevalier was the only non-hereditary noble rank and was only awarded for genuine personal accomplishment. In comparison, I know of children being knighted Tudor England as a status symbol). Tabitha, who appeared to be no more than thirteen, did not seem a likely candidate for that accolade.

"Miss Zerbst from Germania comes from a family of distinguished war heroes and she herself has a very strong background in fire magic."

Kirche preened and Louise drew herself up, expecting similar praise. However, Osman seemed to be struggling to find something similarly creditable, covering for his indecision with an unconvincing coughing fit. "And of course Miss Vallière is of a similarly prestigious family and has demonstrated her true noble character by being the first to step forwards to apprehend Fouquet the Crumbling Dirt." He adopted a solemn tone and added. "If anyone thinks that they're more capable than the mentioned three, please step forward."

There was no sudden rush of volunteers but Miss Longueville did raise her hand. "Headmaster, perhaps I should accompany the three of them as a guide."

"An excellent suggestion," the elderly mage agreed. "Well then, the academy awaits the capture of Fouquet."

The three young noblewomen held their wands up in what I took to be some sort of formal gesture. "We swear upon our wands to capture Fouquet," they chorused and then curtsied. Behind them I folded my arms across my chest and directed what I hoped was a withering glare at these so-called 'responsible adults'.

.oOo.

Siesta almost tackled me to the ground when I went to the kitchen to see what could be thrown together for provisions. Given that I'd missed dinner entirely the previous night and barely managed to piece together a quick supper by scavenging directly off the dining tables before they were cleared, I was rather hungry.

"You're alright!" she exclaimed in relief. "I was so afraid that you wouldn't survive!"

"I'm not sure we even laid eyes on Fouquet."

"Not him, I heard you went off into the forest so that Miss Louise could practice her magic!"

"It's alright, I only got blown up once."

There was a muffled squeak and she pulled back to examine me. "You were blown up!"

"Just a little bit. My own fault really." It wasn't as if I was particularly hurt: Louise was still tender in places from the mild burns she'd suffered whereas mine weren't bothering me at all. "I'd tell you all about it but unfortunately I am on a bit of schedule so it'll have to wait until I get back."

"Back?" Siesta asked. "You're going away again?"

I chuckled. "Siesta, I was only away a few hours. Hopefully this little trip won't take any longer."

"Where are you going?"

"Miss Longueville - Headmaster Osman's secretary - has a lead to where Fouquet might have taken the Staff of Destruction so Kirche, Tabitha and Louise volunteered to go and capture him."

Siesta nodded. "Oh I do hope they capture that villainous thief. How many teachers are going?"

I rolled my eyes. "It seems that they've decided to 'heroically' stay here and guard the academy in case Fouquet returns."

"T-then you're going to hunt for the most famous and dangerous thief in the world with just the three of you!"

"And Osman's secretary."

The maid burst into tears and threw her arms around me, although I managed to keep my arms free this time. "If Fouquet doesn't crush you with a golem then Miss Louise will kill you with her explosions!" Uncertainly, I patted her on the shoulder in what was meant to be reassurance. Given that I'd gone against her advice with regard to the almost disasterous duel with Montmorency, I should probably have paid a little more regard to her concerns.


	5. Chapter 5

Rather than riding Sylphid (who might have been wearied by carrying five of us such a distance) or individual horses (the stables were understandably reluctant to provide horses to Louise and by extension myself as only one of the horses we had borrowed had returned so far) the little expedition had been provided with a carriage. Lest you think this was one of the elaborate coaches found in Westerns or period dramas, this was rather more along the lines of a cart with some wooden planks fitted as chairs. Tristain had apparently not discovered suspension at this time and the ride was more than a touch hard on the rear end.

For lack of anyone else with experience handling a team of horses, Miss Longueville had taken the reins. Kirche, by virtue of getting there first had claimed the place beside the secretary and we had barely trundled out of the gate before she started pestering the young woman. "This type of job could be done by a commoner, why do you have to do it yourself?"

"It's all right," Longueville told her. "I'm not a noble anyway."

"But you're Headmaster Osman's secretary?"

"Yes, that's true. But Old Osman isn't someone who worries about a person's status when he looks for help. It doesn't bother him if someone is a noble or a commoner."

Kirche looked fascinated. "Would you mind telling me the details of how you lost your noble status?"

Her response was a serene smile from Longeuville, although I suspected that the question was on the nature of 'what precisely were the crimes that led your parents to have their first meeting in adjacent prison cells?'

"Just tell me, please, even if it's just a little," Kirche begged, leaning closely towards the secretary. Unlike Kirche's usualy targets, gratuitious exposure to her cleavage didn't seem to be having a persuasive effect upon Longueville. "It's not for me, it's for the benefit of Louise the Zero when she gets disowned for not having any magic..."

Only the fact that I had 'accidentally' put my foot on Louise's cloak, tangling her arm and thus blocking her from drawing her wand stopped my master from making what would have probably been highly effective magic based at blasting Kirche off the cart and quite possibly all the way back to the Academy. "Miss Zerbst," I reminded her politely. "I think you saw yesterday that my master has considerable proficiency with certain forms of magic and is no danger whatsoever of being disowned or sent away to a foreign country." Alright, the last part was probably gratuitous but I didn't see any especial reason not to get a stab or two in.

"That's right!" Louise agreed. "Stop raking up someone's past."

"But I'm bored, I need someone to talk to."

In fairness, Kirche's closest companion was Tabitha, who wasn't verbose at the best of times and was in fact curled up at the back of the cart with a book open and entirely obscuring her face from the rest of us.

"Didn't you volunteer to come?"

"Only because you did first. It's your impetuousness that got me into this mess, Louise. Capturing Fouquet..."

"As preparation perhaps you could tell me about this Fouquet?" I suggested in a rather transparent change of subject. "Is the giant golem typical of his approach?"

Louise sighed and sat back against the side of the cart. "Not always. No one knows much about him but he's stolen treasures from nobles in every corner of the country. Sometimes he strikes by stealth and sometimes he just smashes in with a golem. The only things that are certain are that he - or she - must be an Earth Mage of at least triangle class, that he leaves insulting notes on the scene of his crimes, and that he prefers to take items of great magical power."

I nodded. "So what you're saying is that this Fouquet takes prominent targets and boasts about it. Sounds every supervillain I've ever heard of."

"Supervillain?" asked Longueville, looking back for a moment. I suppose that it's not as dangerous to do so driving a cart as it is when driving a car.

"A term from my homeland. It's used to describe magic users and others with power that use those talents not only to benefit themselves - which is understandable enough - but also to do so at the expense of others. Thieves, murderers, kidnappers... criminals whose talents place them beyond the reach of most authorities."

Kirche shook her head. "But surely someone must do something about them!"

"Well of course. There are of course those who use their own talents to oppose supervillains. Typically they group together into motley bands of individals with complementary capabilities... a fire mage, a wind mage, an exploder mage and her familiar for an example." I gestured the four of us. "And... what is your element, Miss Longueville?"

"I'm an Earth Mage," she told me. "Perhaps your homeland isn't so very dfferent from Tristain."

"Well I think there are one or two differences." I didn't elaborate anymore and after Kirche started fretting a little more she decided to enliven the journey by singing a song. I would like to assure you that there is no prejudice behind my judgement: her singing voice is not what draws boys towards her.

"That was terrible!" Louise asserted once we managed to shut Kirche up.

"It's a traditional Germainian song," she protested.

"Sung mostly in taverns no doubt," Louise objected.

"I'd like to hear you do better."

Unsurprisingly, my master took up the gauntlet. I was surprised to find out that not only did she have a decent voice but she didn't select some romantic ballad but instead a song glorifying what seemed like some kind of military unit: the Silver Gryphons.

~" It's time to make a stand, it's time to pay the cost.

The Reaper's scythe is sweeping in.

Amazed and desperate, the day is all but lost.

There's just one chance you have to win.

Send in the Silver Gryphons! "~

"Nice song," I congratulated her when she came to the end. "Who are the these Silver Gryphons?"

"It's a common name for the Gryphon Order of Knights," Louise said with a slight blush at the compliment. "My fiancé is their captain."

"Eh? You're engaged?" I exclaimed in surprise. It was the first that I had heard of her being in a relationship with anyone.

"It's been arranged for years." Louise must have seen my unvoiced response on my face because she added, "It's expected for nobles to settles such matters quite early. I suppose commoners can afford to wait until they're older since there is less at stake."

"It's political then?"

"Obviously." She gave me a curious look. "You aren't engaged then?"

"I'm not even dating." I rubbed the back of my head. "I think mum and dad would kill me if I got engaged this young. And my brothers would kill the guy on general principle."

"What's dating?" asked Kirche, intrigued now that the opposite gender had become a topic of conversation.

I sighed. What was I, a sociologist? "It's a boy and a girl getting to know each other in a romantic setting. Possibly you'd call it courting? Assuming it goes well of course. Boys and romance don't often go well together if the other girls from my old school are to be believed."

"But surely you must have had some boys interested in you," Kirche suggested. "Why after myself you are one of the prettier girls at the Academy."

"It may be my imagination but I don't think boys particularly like girls who can throw them around a room without breaking a sweat," I told her and then looked down at my chest. I know it had only been a week since my burnout but I was almost certain that I'd continued to grow since that little episode, albeit at a less drastic rate. "And I'm a bit of a late developer."

"Pff." Kirche waved these obstacles. "Boys from your homeland must be puny weaklings. I will introduce you to some sturdy Germainian boys who will open your heart to ardor. I'm sure some of them are still talking to me."

"That won't be necessary."

"Oh?" Kirche looked me up and down and then nodded understandingly. "I understand."

Something told me that she didn't.

"It's obvious now! The way you share Louise's bed, the maid you're always following around..."

"No!" I'd pretty much guessed where she was going at this point.

"It's obvious that your passions are those that you dare not speak of!"

Louise gasped. "Ellen! What is she talking about?"

"She's raving mad!" I exclaimed.

"Come to my bosom, I will not judge you!" Kirche tried to drag my face down into her cleavage and while I was able to resist that quite effectively, in doing so she overbalanced and spilled herself onto Louise.

There was a whistling crack and we looked up to see Miss Longueville had cracked the whip above the horses. "I hope I don't have to turn around and take you back to the Academy with your mission unfulfilled because you were too busy squabbling," she observed mildly.

"No Miss Longueville," Kirche and Louise chorused, straightening themselves out.

"And Miss Vallière, your familiar's feelings for other women are not unusual for a girl her age so please be considerate of them." And then she had the nerve to giggle.

"It's not true!" I wailed.

.oOo.

Although the sun was high in the sky as we entered the forest, once we were under the trees shadows shrouded us in darkness. This more or less matched my mood since I had been the butt of jokes about my alleged sexuality for almost an hour and had twice had to remind myself firmly that experimenting with tapping into natural sources of quintessence in order to start casting explosions on my companions in the manner of Louise would probably not be a good idea. However tempting Kirche made it.

I've made enough bad decisions lately and I'd really rather that something went right for a change.

Miss Longueville brought the cart to a halt. "We'll have to walk from here," she told us and climbed down. The rest of us followed her, first Kirche then Tabitha and Louise and I at the back.

Louise waited until the other three were all looking forwards and then gave me a significant look before quickly pointing at her temple, whipping her hand down before Kirche casually glanced left and might have seen her out of the corner of her eye. I couldn't see anything on her forehead so I presumed that she wanted me to enter into telepathic communication with her. I wasn't enthused about the idea as it meant lowering my clairvoyance, which was currently keeping me alert to anything moving around us - anyone trying to sneak up behind us would be in for a rude surprise.

When she received no indication that I had complied, Louise tried to elbow me below the ribs. I blocked with my hand, diverting the blow and leaving her slightly off balance. She glared and I sighed inwardly. Clearly she wasn't going to give up and so, with a nervous glance over my shoulder, I switched to telepathy.

'No,' I shot irritably into her mind once I saw the uppermost question in her mind. I suppose I could make protestations of having no prejudices against homosexuals and intellectually I don't. However as far as I know I've never even met one and being accused of it when I've hardly even had a relationship with a boy had definitely stirred up some emotions that I would definitely like to keep packed away in a quiet corner of my mind.

'T-that's not what I wanted,' she protested quickly. 'It was about Fouquet's golem.'

'What about it?'

Louise's question was hesitant. 'Do you really think I destroyed it?'

'It's possible, although I hasten to add that I see no reason he couldn't create another one. But it's also possible that as you'd done some damage and given time I think could have broken it up completely that Fouquet decided to abandon it and let it collapse in order to cover for his escape.'

She lowered her head. 'Then again I was a failure. A zero.'

I took her hand comfortingly (after checking that the others weren't looking back). 'You did more than anyone. And now you are rested and well prepared to show your full power.'

That perked her up although it did raise another question in her mind. Or rather, the same question as before.

"Yes, dammit I am sure," I snapped taking my hand away.

"What was that?" Kirche asked, glancing back.

Longueville held her hand up for silence. "Shush, we're almost there." We clustered up behind her, peeking around a bush to look at the house. It was quite small and sat in a clearing about the size of one of the courts at Tristain Academy. If it was typical of commoner dwellings then I have to admit that the primitive conditions I had experienced so far really were the lap of luxury in comparison.

"From my information, that should be the place," Longueville told us.

"I don't see movement." Kirche squinted. "Nor any light. Is Fouquet really inside?"

"Someone will look inside," Tabitha decided. She used her staff to scratch out a quick map of the clearing - not much more than a rough circle with a square to represent the house, marked for the door and the one window that we could see. "Other doors?"

"I'll look around," I suggested and moved off. I'm not exactly good at woodscraft - what do you expect? I've always lived in towns and cities! - but I at least had some idea of how to move without making too much noise, something that didn't seem to concern the other girls much.

When I got back to confirm there were no other doors or windows it had been democratically decided that I would be the best person to check the house while the rest of them stood back, ready to cast spells at Fouquet if this provoked him to come out in search of enough earth to raise up his trademark golem. I suppose I could have complained about being sent away during the decision-making if it wasn't already clear that I wouldn't have a vote anyway...

.oOo.

Prudently I elected to approach the house from one of the sides that lacked window or door. It was possible that someone could simply look out through a crack in the walls or something, but they would have to notice me first which was less probable this way. If Fouquet was really there then I wanted to be as close possible, since I'd need to get in arm's reach before he could bring his wand to bear. I might be able to dodge a spell now that I was more familiar with how mages worked their magic in this world but I'd rather not count on that.

Creeping along the wooden walls of the house I peeked through the window. There didn't seem to be any internal walls so it only took a moment to take in the whole house and there wasn't enough furniture to hide anyone behind. A table and a chair, both covered in dust. A small stack of firewood in one corner... and on the table, a bottle of wine that didn't seem dusty at all. No sign of an occupant though.

There was something wrong there... even if Fouquet was incredibly tolerant of the dust he would surely have disturbed it at some point and the chair was the most likely place for that to take place. If it wasn't for the bottle I would have said that no one had been here for months, maybe years. Obviously someone had been here recently, but I doubted that this was a hideout.

I turned and ran directly away from the house as fast as I could, reinforcing my shields. "It's a trap!" I shouted to warn the girls. I wasn't sure about that, but it felt right and I'd rather the embarassment of a false warning than see the one of them hurt because I ignored my instincts.

Of course, Kirche responded to the warning by lobbing a fireball at the door, apparently believing that Fouquet must be hot on my heels. And since I was running directly at them I had to dive to the ground to avoid taking the hit - okay, it probably wouldn't have hurt me, but I'm not in the habit of taking hits I can avoid. Fortunately Tabitha and Louse were more reserved and I was able to scramble back to my feet and rejoin them without further incident.

"What happened?" Louise exclaimed. "Was he there?"

"No one's there. There's only a bottle of wine to say anyone has been there for days, and thick dust everywhere. This isn't a hideout!"

Louise turned around. "Are you sure this is the right... Miss Longueville? Miss Longueville?"

I looked around and there was no sign of the secretary.

"Fouquet must have got her!" Kirche was standing back to back with Tabitha, a reaction I applauded although I didn't entirely agree with her conclusion.

I pushed Louise towards the other two mages, who stepped out to include her in their formation. "Perhaps not." I crouched so as not to obscure their line of sight and lowered my shields.

Clairvoyance didn't reveal anything - wherever she was, Longueville was out of line of sight and I only have 360 degree vision, not remote viewing. I hadn't expected any better. But there was another method of finding her: my telepathy. I couldn't pinpoint a direction from that, but there was a good chance her thoughts would tell me what she was doing and where.

"What are you talking about?" Louise hissed.

"Maybe she's working with Fouquet," I suggested. "For that matter, maybe she is Fouquet: she's an Earth mage after all. I'll see if I can find out."

"What are you talking about?" asked Kirche, "You're just squatting there..."

"Trust Ellen, she knows what she's doing." That was Louise. I appreciated her confidence although it was misplaced. I'd never tried this before.

Telepathy is usually either active, peering into someone's mind, or coercive where you directly affect someone's thinking. But there is a third type, common to almost all telepaths and almost always ignored as soon as a telepath manages to turn it off: passive telepathy where instead of focusing on one person you just open yourself up the thoughts of those around you. Involuntarily it was a nuisance, but for something like this.

The first thoughts I 'heard' were those of the other three girls. Trepedation on the part of Louise and to a lesser extent Kirche and Tabitha. Kirche was excited (and in ways I could have done without knowing about) whereas Tabitha was controlled (and oddly, there was a sense of liberation there). And my master really did feel that I would pull something out of my hat to salvage the situation.

Then I reached further out. The forest was deserted, leading me to belatedly wonder what commoners would have been around to tell Longueville about the house. No, this was a set up, I was sure about it.

And there she was. Most of her attention was upon her spellcasting, but I could feel no sense that she was afraid. More irritated... and filled with a bitter, bitter hatred for the nobility of Tristain and of the neighbouring nations. Bitter enough that I withdrew and raised my shields reflexively. I could have gone deeper, probably, without arousing her suspicions, but I really didn't want to.

"Ladies, please consider Miss Longueville to be exceedingly hostile," I warned as I stood. "And we're about to be attacked, may I suggest we provide a moving target?"

"What do you mean," asked Kirche.

Tabitha pulled lightly on her sleeve. "Run," she advised succinctly and then matched action to words, running out into the clearing, whistling piercingly - something that seemed to be bothering me more than it did either of the others.

Kirche broke into a run but Louise hesitated. "We can't just run away."

I scooped her up bridal fashion and chased after Tabitha. "It's a strategic withdrawal - we need some distance to reassess the situation."

With a shriek of what sounded almost like laughter, Sylphid swooped down, shadow sweeping briefly across us before she landed next to Tabitha. The blue-haired girl scrambled up to sit upon the dragon's shoulders and held out a hand to help Kirche up.

Then there was a rumble as the earth moved between us, seperating Louise and I from our companions. I ran aside and Louise, peering back over my shoulder squealed in dismay. "It's the golem!"

I switched to clairvoyance for a moment, surprised by how little impact it had on my ability to carry a girl almost my own size (here's to a healthy exercise regieme!) and she was right. Fortunately Tabitha had urged Sylphid into the sky at the first sign of danger. Pity we weren't aboard, but not her fault and it's not as if she was heading for the horizon. "Can you cast while I carry you?"

"No!"

"Then we have a problem!"

"What?"

"This thing's just about as fast as me, and if I stop so you can cast then we're going to be flattened!" The golem didn't move its legs all that fast, but it the strides were long enough that it didn't really matter.

"Can't you fight it?"

"Oddly, none of my martial arts training centred on defeating hundred foot tall earth golems. It's a bit of a lapse really!" I squinted at the sky and started angling towards where Sylphid was circling. Fire and wind blazed down at the Golem but I couldn't see that they were having any more effect than yesterday. "We need to get you up there where you can cast un-obstructed."

Louise nodded assent. "But how?"

"Tabitha and Kirche can both levitate someone the way Montmorency did, right?"

"Well, yes. All magi can." Except, of course, Louise.

"Excellent." I shifted my grip on my master and then screamed as loudly as I could: "TABITHA! CATCH!"

In the distance I could see Tabitha's head turning, light reflecting off her spectacles. Unceremoniously I hurled Louise up into the air. Not the most graceful fastball special ever, but this wasn't exactly a comicbook and her shriek of fright would ensure she was readily detectable by the airborne half of our little bad. Sure enough, Tabitha waved her staff and Louise was slowed and then lifted up to sit behind Kirche.

Okay, Louise was in a position to provide effective ranged support (something Kirche wasn't managing, which should be good for my master's ego) and since I had my hands free now I might be able do something about the Golem. Turning on my heel I ran directly at the golem. Fulfilling every stereotype of something that size, it proved unable to alter its direction in a hurry and was still in the process of slowing down as I closed in and leapt up to slam a spinning kick against one knee.

It felt like kicking a brick wall... well it felt like me kicking a brick wall, which fortunately for me is a touch different than the normal experience or I'd have had several broken bones in my foot. The leg cracked for almost half its width and a good much of the earth involved fell away in chunks the size soccer balls as I bounded away behind it, landing in a roll to soak up my momentum before turning to have another go.

There was a sharp detonation as I turned and I saw smoke billowing up from the damaged knee. Evidently Louise had made an excellent choice of target because although she hadn't destroyed the remainder of the joint entirely, between us we'd done enough damage that it wasn't supporting the tremendous mass of the golem. It lurched to one side and as it fell to the ground I saw the lower leg simply break away and crumble to dirt.

However, unlike yesterday when the golem had entirely collapsed, most of the giant remained intact and the magical construct pulled itself upright, more earth swelling from the ground to meet with the broken leg, reforming it.

"Oh that's just cheating," I grumbled.

There was a disconcertingly amused response from behind me. "I see that the familiar is the brains of this little band."

I kept part of my attention on the golem turning towards me as I moved aside, turning to see Longueville at the edge of the trees, her wand in hand. "Miss Longueville... or Fouquet should I say?" Risking the moment I resorted to telepathy again. "Although that's also a pseudonym, isn't it?" Sure enough another name, one that didn't ring any bells for me, popped into her thoughts.

She nodded slightly, having let her hair down and removed her glasses. "Well of course. Don't those 'supervillains' of yours adopt a suitable sobriquet for their exploits?"

"Indeed." Another explosion punctuated my reply as Louise had another go, this time blasting a chunk out of the golem's chest. It didn't slow down appreciably as it walked towards me. "I don't suppose you'd return the Staff of Destruction if I ask you nicely, would you?"

"After I went to all the trouble of charming the foolish Mr. Colbert into revealing the secrets of its security? Do be serious."

I backpedalled away from the Golem. "Not even a hint as to its location? Be more sporting, after all you had the entertainment of watching the nobles flap around like headless chickens earlier."

Fouquet chuckled. "That was rather satisfying, but I'm a professional, you see."

Not professional enough to keep the staff's hiding place from flashing though her mind, although I kept the momentary elation from my mind, instead quietly reaching out to Louise's mind. 'Louise, the Staff of Destruction is in a chest inside the house. I'll see if I can draw the golem away so you can recover it.' "I have to wonder then, why you're still here. You had the staff, you could surely have made an entirely clean escape. But instead you came and lured a search party after you. The... logic escapes me."

"Hmm... I suppose I can at least explain that if it will allow you to rest in peace." Fouquet smiled coquettishly in unpleasent contrast to her words. I didn't have much trouble imagining how she'd gotten secrets out of Colbert's loose lips. "I had taken the Staff of Destruction but what I then discovered was that I lacked the knowledge to use it."

"Odd, you rather strike me as the knowledgeable type." I kept backing away, Fouquet moving to keep the Golem between her and the flying dragon. It didn't seem that the Golem had any vulnerable spots, or if it did Louise's determined efforts to find it by sheer random pummeling with explosions hadn't found it.

"Oh you'll make me blush." Fouquet laughed into her hand. "Are you sure that you aren't..."

I'm sure my eyebrow twitched. "Is that a confession on your part?"

"You're a capable young woman and I'm open to new experiences. I think I could find room for a canny young assistant."

"Something tells me that even if I was interested, you're too professional to leave me alive."

"Alas for what might have been," she sighed mockingly. "In any event, no matter how I waved the staff or applied my magic on it, there was no response at all. That frustrated me. After all, if I do not know how to use it, it would be just as useful as a decorative item, wouldn't it."

I nodded, seeing Sylphid swooping down towards the house. "That would rather reduce the market value, wouldn't it?"

"Yes, that's why I'm letting your master and her friends retrieve it now."

Well crap.

"Don't feel so bad," she said as the golem reached down and scooped her up. "Really, I can't imagine why Osman thought a handful of children would be able to stop Fouquet the Crumbling Dirt." She braced herself on one finger of the giant hand as the golem started to turn. "I do wonder how those girls worked out its location though." And she stabbed out with her wand towards me.

Fortunately, that much I had been anticipating: in her role as Osman's secretary Fouquet could hardly have been unaware of how the duel against Montmorency had played out. She knew that leaving me suspended in mid-air would neutralise me neatly and I didn't think she was daft enough to leave me at her back while she took on my friends. Of course, I had been giving thought as to how I might counter just such an attack and so, as threads of magic formed around me, I seized hold of the flows with my left hand and stabbed towards the thief with my right hand.

Quintessence flowed through me, draining her spell and then empowering my own use of that same magic upon my opponent. Fouquet shouted in dismay as she was yanked from her perch and then I released the spell, dropping her to fall fifty feet towards the ground. With inches to spare she managed to halt her fall, bringing herself to a hover right in place to be doubled up when I hurled myself forwards in a flying kick.

Her wand went flying and the golem finished its turn and halted, waiting further commands. Those commands would not be coming from Fouquet however, for I pinned her to the ground in a choke that cut off the blood to her brain just long enough to reduce her to unconciousness.

.oOo.

"Is that it?" Louise had found the chest and inside it... well it wasn't what I'd expected.

"Unmistakeably. I saw it once during my tour of the tour vault," Kirche told her. "Funny looking thing isn't it?"

No kidding. For the first time in about a week I was looking at something made of plastic and modern metals that wasn't my personal property. Not much more than two feet long it had obviously been machined, which wasn't something I'd come to expect in Tristain.

"Could I have a look at that?"

She handed it over and I turned the 'staff' over in my hands. 'Made in the USA'? And this was no staff, more like some sort of military one-shot rocket launcher. An M-72, whatever that signified. I could see how it would unfold, all very logical and by local standards quite destructive when used.

"Er, Louise? Does your familiar's hand glow like that often?"

Glow? Sure enough, there was light coming from the back of my left hand. Holding the Staff of Destruction carefully in my other hand, I stared at it. It was the runes carved there that were glowing. "Is this... normal?"

Louise shook her head. "No, it isn't."

"Two mysteries for the price of one," I commented and handed the staff back to Kirche. The moment that it left my hand, the runes ceased to glow. "No, I tell a lie. Hand that back would you?"

Hmm, holding the weapon lit my hand up as if the runes were marked with flourescent paint. Releasing it... nope, light was gone again. "One mystery. I've not seen one before but I believe that this comes from my homeland. They don't usually light someone's hand up though."

"What does it do then?"

"Well if Fouquet had had it to begin with then she could probably have broken open the tower without using her golem."

Louise's eyes went wide. "But that's been fortified by generations of magi!"

"It didn't slow her down very much, did it?" I pointed out. "Maybe you and Kirche should take this back to the school now, Tabitha. Louise and I can take Fouquet back in the cart and I'd feel happier being away from it until I know why it makes these marks glow."

"Why are you giving orders?" Louise asked peevishly. "You're a familiar: we'll make the decision."

Thank you for the reminder, I thought irritably. "A thousand apologies, o illustrious master."

She flushed slightly at the evident mockery. "We'll do it your way?"

"Are you sure you'll be okay with her?" Kirche asked. "She's a triangle mage, you know."

"Really? I hadn't noticed." I pulled Fouquet's wand out of the back pocket of my jeans. "Guess I'd better not turn my back on her then. Or will she be casting magic without this?"

"You did." Tabitha cut to the point.

"That's true, you said you couldn't use magic." Kirche seized on that point. "But you used it to drag her away from the Golem, didn't you?"

"I turned her spell back on her," I said shortly. "I figured out the basic idea yesterday, although as you noticed it's not the safest of tricks."

"But you used magic, didn't you? So you are a noble."

"Any idiot can use magic, Kirche. Which is probably a good thing, considering some of your classmates. The catch is to have magic to use in the first place, which most people don't. That's about as far as my grasp of magical theory goes so you'll have to figure out how it affects your little social ladder for yourself." Did I sound bitter? Hmm, possibly. Maybe Fouquet's feelings were affecting me more than I should allow them to. Or maybe after the last couple of days I was feeling a bit stressed. Take your choice.

"Just go away, Kirche," Louise insisted. She grabbed Fouquet by the hair and tried to drag her off towards the cart. She actually made it a couple of inches before the hair started to come away.

"Please don't do that," I told her. "Ripping her hair out might sound theraputic but the teachers probably wouldn't understand." I lifted Fouquet and put her over my shoulder in a fireman's carry, handing her wand over to Louise for safekeeping: it wouldn't be very smart to leave it in ready reach of the thief once she woke.

Kirche huffed and walked away. "I'll figure out your secrets," she called back over her shoulder. "You see if I don't." If she did figure out any then I'd be only to pleased to have the answers: there was too much going on that I didn't understand.

A moment later Sylphid was in the air and flapping lazily in the direction of of the Academy while Louise and I walked back under the trees. We walked in silence for a long moment before Louise turned to me. "You shouldn't have mocked me in front of the others."

"Woof."

"What?"

"Treat me like a dog and I assure you I'll be quite the bitch."

"I..." She broke off and thought back. "I'm sorry. I was hoping to prove myself, but I didn't do anything useful. That wasn't your fault."

"Apology accepted. I'm a bit on edge after reading Fouquet's mind."

Louise nodded. "I suppose she's a noble who lost her title. Such people often turn to crime."

"I didn't exactly get chapter and verse, but it sounds about right. Her name's Mathilda and her father was a duke somewhere called... Saxe-Gotha? Sounds sort of Germainian."

"It's a town in Albion," Louise told me. "I think the duke was convicted of treason a few years ago and the region reverted to the crown after he was removed."

That sounded like a very bloodless description to me, but while I've read a great many of my brother's fantasy novels, most of them dwell more on the swords and the sorcery instead of the politics so I've no idea how that would work out.

.oOo.

It took us most of the afternoon to return to the Academy with Fouquet. She woke up before we had even reached the edge of the forest but after one abortive attempt to overpower me (which never had the remotest chance of succeeding) she had been sullenly uncommunicative for the whole journey.

The stablehands - visibly surprised to see Louise and I return with all the horses entrusted to us this time - took Fouquet into custody, or as close to it as could be managed with the resources at hand. And then, despite my stomach rumbling, we were guided up to the Headmaster's office where Kirche and Tabitha were waiting for us.

"A job well done for all of you," Osman told us. "You have returned the Staff of Destruction and captured Fouquet. I never would have suspected Miss Longueville of such a deception."

Kirche's face twitched as if torn over whether to say anything.

"Apparently her... womanly charms were applied to reveal information about the security around the vaults," I advised Colbert, who was standing at Osman's shoulder. He cleared his throat uneasily.

"That was also how she was hired," grumbled Kirche.

"Oh?"

"There's no need to dwell on that," Osman told us hastily. "What is done is done and now we must look to the future. Fouquet will be handed to the royal authorities for punishment and I have sent word asking that the title of Chevalier be awarded to you, Louise, and to you Kirche. Since you already hold that title, Tabitha, I have asked that you be presented with the Elven Medallion."

This announcement wiped the annoyance from Kirche's face and brightened Louise's expression as well. It was harder to judge Tabitha's expression but I thought I detected a slight smile there as well. Perhaps it was my imagination. "Really?" Kirche said, sounding delighted.

"Absolutely," confirmed the old man. "I have every confidence that these awards will be made. You have done more than enough to deserve the title, wouldn't you say?"

Louise looked at me and then back at the Headmaster. "Sir, we wouldn't have succeeded without Ellen."

He nodded. "It does you credit to say as much, Chevalier Vallière." (Louise blushed at the title) "Unfortunately and, I must admit, unjustly there will be no such award made for her. As your familiar, her actions are considered to be your own and thus too the rewards for those actions." He lowered his head slightly as he turned his gaze upon me. "For this you have my sincerest apologies, Miss Ellen."

"I think I can live without a title or a piece of metal," I answered resolutely, although in truth I did feel somewhat jealous.

It must have shown because Kirche spoke up. "If it's because a commoner, then she isn't really."

Osman looked up but it was Colbert who replied. "What do you mean by that, Kirche?"

"She used magic on Fouquet," Kirche explained. "So she has to at least be of noble blood."

Colbert looked fascinated but Osman raised his hand. "If the matter were merely Miss Ellen being a commoner, then I could at least offer her some financial reward, Kirche. The true obstacle to offering her proper recognition is her status as Louise's familiar. Now, before I forget, as the Staff of Destruction has been recovered I have decided that tonight's Ball of Frigg will resume as planned."

"Hurrah!" Kirche sang out. "Let's forget about Fouquet and dance all night long!" I hoped she would also forget about me, at least as a subject to her idea of humour.

He chuckled. "I would imagine that you young chevaliers will be the main attraction there. No doubt you will want to pretty yourselves up for the occasion...?"

The other girls bowed and headed out the room, no doubt already planning what they would wear for the occasion. I knew the feeling, but I already knew that I didn't have anything suitable. After all, the only dress I had was borrowed from Siesta. Rather than following them, I continued to look at the headmaster and Colbert, smiling as winsomely as I could manage. "Please gentlemen, may I ask a question of you?"

It must have had some effect because Colbert's cheeks went red. "O-of course you can, Ellen."

"Would you tell me where the Staff of Destruction came from?"

Old Osman nodded paternally. "Of course I will. The man who gave me the Staff of Destruction was my saviour." He stroked his beard and then nodded. "A most mysterious stranger I met thirty years ago. I was simply walking in the forest, minding my own business, when I was attacked by a two-headed dragon. For a mage alone, that is almost certain death, but at the last moment a man I had never met used a similar staff to slay the beast before collapsing from his own wounds."

He sighed mournfully. "I brought the poor fellow here, to the Academy, but there was nothing we could do for him. When we buried him I placed the staff he had used alongside him but the second staff I kept in a box in the vault, never daring to tamper with it for fear of unleashing its power upon myself."

I nodded. "You're sure it was thirty years ago?"

"Oh yes. Why do you ask?"

I looked him over and then looked at Colbert. Well, I had to trust someone. "I wasn't summoned from some other corner of this world. I am from another world entirely, one different from this one in many ways. What you call the Staff of Destruction is a weapon from my own world, and one that has been used for thirty or forty years, I don't know exactly. Since you encountered it so long ago, it is probable that time passes no more slowly or swiftly here than it does there, which is some comfort to me."

I still didn't know how to go home, but at least once I did manage it, I was unlikely to find that centuries had passed while I was here.

.oOo.

Above the high ceiling of the Alviss dining hall is a second hall, even grander than the one below. It didn't strike me as the wisest of arrangements but doubtless it had made sense to the architect. There were other differences than the decoration of course: while the hall below was for feasting, this one was plainly intended for purposes formal, ceremonial or - in this case - social.

It's another oddity: while the school uniform is relatively modern and the general level of technology is almost medieval, the formal garb of the nobility is apparently similar to that of the eighteenth century, right down to the knee breeches of the men while the ladies wore ball gowns and the lot of them gathered around tables filled with elaborately prepared food and chatted between the formal dances.

I took all this in as Louise swept in through doors to the announcement: "The daughter of Duke Vallière, Louise Françoise Le Blanc de La Vallière arrives!"

Louise wore white, a low cut gown and high gloves, her hair bound high before spilling down her back in a ponytail. She'd wanted my help putting it up and while I've no experience of anything so complicated the task was done to her satisfaction.

I was wearing a loaner from her wardrobe that Siesta had demonstrated her talent for needlework on to adjust for my slightly larger frame. The dress was a rich yellow that I didn't think worked with my own darker colouring and that was more snug than I had expected, while the long skirts were a hindrance. Siesta claimed I looked adorable while Louise had humphed irritably.

As if they had planned it (and maybe they had) the musicans switched to a soothing music, realising that no one would be dancing until the new arrival had been welcomed. I looked around and spotted Kirche in a dress that it looked like she would fall out of any minute. It might have explained the number of boys surrounding her, although their heads were uniformly now turned in our directions. Tabitha was at one of the tables, digging into a sizeable slice of ham. I think it was the first time I'd seen her without a book in arms reach.

And then we were surrounded by well-wishers, almost of them male.

"May I have the honour of the next dance," Guiche and Malicorne asked breathlessly and in near unison.

I didn't fancy Malicorne's chances with Louise, to be honest. Then again, the augished wail of "Guiche!" from Montmorency strongly suggested that the boy asking me was burning bridges behind him.

"No thank you," I declined.

Beside me, Louise was presumably flustered by the sudden attention (either that or she'd had well concealed feelings for the fellow) since she had nodded and Malicorne now had her by the hand.

"Please, I insist," persisted Guiche. "Allow this humble rose to bloom for you."

I kept my voice low and very even. "I'm not interested in you, de Gramont. Nor in your games."

Then I moved past him, heading for Tabitha. That ham looked appetising. Unbelievably, four other boys asked me to dance as I crossed the floor. This morning they'd been about as likely to do that as they were to flirt with Montmorency's frog familiar. Something had changed, either rumour of the day's excitement or the fact that I was wearing a low cut dress.

Tabitha looked up as i took a seat opposite her. "You're not dancing?"

A more spritely tune had sprung up and now couples were moving through formal measures on the floor. "Firstly, I don't know the steps. Secondly, I'm hungry." She nodded and generously offered me a slice she'd just carved off the ham.

I'd just about managed to get a decent meal, meaning I could have stood to eat about as much again, when Kirche finally approached. "What's this I hear about you not dancing with anyone, Ellen?"

"I'm prioritising," I told her, not looking back as I scooped some mushrooms onto my plate next to a couple of pastries.

She tossed her hair and I could practically hear the silk of her dress stretching. "You realise you're just cementing my suspicion that you've no interest in boys." Then she shot Tabitha a sly look. "Or should I just cut to the chase and ask your intentions towards my best friend?"

I rested my face briefly in my hand. "You're not giving up on this, are you?"

Kirche laughed. "I suppose I can accept a change of subject for the moment, but you've not convinced me."

Another girl - it took me a moment to identify her as one of the first years - walked up behind Kirche. "What in the world happened to Louise? She's so different tonight!"

"Oh she looks the same to me, Katie." Kirche said carelessly. "A flatchested little Tristainian girl. Seen one and you've seen them all."

Katie - who I recognised as a first year - wasn't exactly stacked herself and she gave Kirche an annoyed look. I swallowed a mouthful of pastry (I'd have to congratulate the cooks next time I was in the kitchens) and waved a finger for her attention. "I think it might be how you look her that's changed rather than Louise herself."

Her brow furrowed as she looked at me. "I don't quite grasp your meaning... uh, I'm sorry, have we met?"

Okay, I didn't think the dress made me look all that different. "Once or twice. But my point is that for the first time in more than a year, you're looking at her and not her reputation. People are rarely as straighforward as they seem on the surface."

"I suppose... I've never really talked to her."

"I think," I said slowly, "That for very few of you ever did more than talk about her. And mostly for the purpose of teasing her." Louise had probably been very lonely, I thought.

"She's quite a good singer," Kirche offered.

"Kirche, compared to you everyone is a good singer."

"I'm a perfectly good singer," she told me rather huffily.

"It's sweet that you believe that," I told her. A point for my side - if she was going to keep ribbing me with her ridiculous theory then I would get a few shots in myself.

"I suppose you could do better?"

"I could." And I could see where this was going too so I reached for a pitcher of what I had figured was watered down wine. I was going to need to need keep my vocal chords lubricated. I'd had a suspicion back when she and Louise sang in the cart that it might get around to my turn and I'd thought a bit about what to sing.

And for the record I'm not that bad at singing. I have it on decent authority that I could have been in the school and the church choirs if I'd had time for practise and so forth. Given that I had afterschool activities three or four evenings a week (and let's just forget weekends) that simply wasn't happening. So I'm a decent amateur. Maybe a very good amateur.

Kirche stood up and gestured for the musicians to bring their current piece to an end. "Ladies and gentlemen, we have a rare pleasure tonight! Louise Vallière's familiar will be singing for us."

I gave her an amused look and then stood up, sipped my wine and then gave the audience a slight bow.

~"You think if you set the price, they'll turn me in.

You think that when I'm up upon the pike you'll win.

They'll say that I was fighting,

For the spirit of the law.

What will they say about you,

When I'm gone?"~

I sipped from my glass and then whistled as much of the bridge as I could manage (the human throat can't reproduce instruments all that well - I'm good, but not that good). The room was silent enough that the thin whistle I substituted for a violin was clearly audible.

~"You murdered and you stole. You mocked the home I gave.

Though I'd prefer a happy end, no man can cheat the grave.

I know what they'll remember,

In the words of every song.

What will they say about you,

When I'm gone?"~

Kirche looked positively stunned and I shot her a sweet smile. Louise looked conflicted: on the other hand, she probably hadn't expected me to have a passable singing voice either. On the plus side, she had managed to get away from Malicorne while he was distracted.

~"They'll say:

We stared into the wind that tore away our breath.

We left behind a message that cannot be claimed by death.

A hero lives forever,

For the ones that carry on.

What will they say?

What will they say?

About you, when I'm gone?"~

I bowed and drained my glass once more. There was a long moment of silence and then the nobles broke out in spontaneous applause. I was somewhat gratified, I didn't think I'd been that good. Then again they didn't have studio-recorded modern music to compare me to so it was a different standard. (It also subsquently occurred to me that the amazing thing about a dancing bear is that it dances at all.)

Before I could turn back to the table and resume my assault upon the various delicacies there, almost a dozen students were crowding around to congratulate me on my singing and in the the cases of the boys to press further invitations to dance.

I was tempted just to refuse. The food was tempting and the boys were being more than a little clumsy in hiding the fact that their eyes weren't settling on my face (the target was a bit lower). However, there were two very good reasons not to refuse. Firstly, the only real hope I had of convincing any of them to see me as more than a human-shaped animal who happened to have been summoned as Louise's familiar was to interact with them and to do so on a more or less equal basis. This ball was a rare opportunity to do so.

And secondly, I don't dislike dancing. Quite the reverse.

"One at a time, gentlemen." I accepted one of the proffered hands. "And I believe there are other girls here." Kirche was taken care of, but I saw Katie accept a hand with a smile to me so possibly I had the beginnings of a friendship there. "Tabitha?"

The blue-haired girl (I had to wonder why she had hair that unusual colour) looked hesitant but finally stood and joined in.

.oOo.

Louise caught my elbow between dances. "Walk with me please."

"Of course, master," I agreed with a regretful look at the buffet table I had been making an advance upon.

She led me out onto a balcony and closed the glass door behind us, cutting us off from the sounds of the ball for a moment. The air outside wasn't cold as such, but it was sufficiently colder that it was noticeable with my bare shoulders. "It won't last you know."

"Hmm?"

"Them treating you like one of them." Louise's expression was pensive. Under the light of the two moons she had an almost ethereal appearance. "I'm sorry if it spoils your evening but..."

"You mean this isn't a miraculous ballad where one impressive deed that no one actually sees will change their opinions of me?" I put my arm across Louise's shoulders and smiled. "I didn't think it was really going to be that easy."

"It never is," she said cynically. "In the morning it'll be back to that nickname."

"Maybe not quite so bad. I mean, you are a Chevalier now."

"That's right I suppose." Louise turned her head just far enough to see me out of the corner of her eyes. "I'm sorry you didn't get any sort of reward."

I nodded. "Confidentially, it is a bit annoying. But when I lost my belts, Mum taught me a little prayer: Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can and wisdom to know the difference."

"It's a nice prayer although I don't see what it has to do with belts," she told me.

Somehow it didn't surprise me that the ranking system for oriental martial arts wasn't something well known in Tristain. Then again, I hadn't seen much in the way of organised martial arts in the brief time I'd been here. "The belts are symbolic in the martial arts schools I attended, indicating progression in studies. Sort of like the colour of your cloak, marking you as a second year student."

"So when you say lost your belts..."

"I was stripped of the status," I confirmed, trying to figure out how to diplomatically take my arm back.

To my surprise, Louise instead took my other arm and hugged me briefly. "Why did you lose them?" she asked after we broke apart.

"I've told you about mutants being different from most people," I explained. "We're not always well liked. And some of the schools were competitive. Since our laws don't allow mutants to compete against baselines - non-mutants - the teachers felt I was no longer entitled to the belts as I couldn't compete for them any more. I lost a few trophies as well because they thought I might have won because of being a mutant even though it was before my talents activated."

"That's not fair."

"There are occasional compensations." I walked forward to the balustrade and leant on it, looking down over the Academy grounds. "When I lost my belts, the compensation was my parents and elder brother visiting the teachers in question for some 'friendly' sparring. This time..."

Louise moved to stand next to me. "This time?"

"This time I got a little bit of hope. The Staff of Destruction is from my world. It means there has been contact before I was summoned and that there might be a way of returning. And judging by its age, time doesn't move any slower here than it does there."

"Why would it?"

"Didn't you ever hear the tales of people who went off under the hill or off with the fairies or something and came back to find out that a hundred years had passed in what had only been a single night for them?"

"Oh, so that's not happening?"

"Not as far as I can tell. Either time is a constant, or it's moving faster here. Either is better than the alternative."

"You're still planning to return home then?" She turned away from me.

"The key word is the one that you said," I pointed out. "'Home'. If the circumstances were reversed then wouldn't you move heaven and earth to return to your family?"

"Well yes."

"Admittedly, then I have to explain to my mother why I spent however long it turns out to take me to get home in another universe rather than attending the not-exactly-inexpensive boarding school that she sent me to. Imagine how your mother would feel in that position."

Louise shivered. "I think in that case I'd probably be safer for me to stay with you."

I chuckled and put my arm back around her. "Let's go inside where it's warm."

Naturally that was when Kirche burst through the balcony, demanding how long it was going to take us to kiss.


End file.
